We read this email at least twenty times this afternoon, not only because it is so poorly written, but also due to the fact that we just couldn’t believe our delicate eyes!
What is accurate?! What proof does he have that the old system was better for taxpayers and businesses? Where’s the data?
We’ve paid very close attention to the new county government since its inception in 2014. We know that every claim that Kirby makes here is false. The Monocacy River Plan does not take anyone’s land, and we cannot even begin to decipher what he means by population center controls when it comes to the Livable Frederick Plan. What is meant by less user friendly is up to wild speculation, as is his statement about the government being detached from the community at large. We all lived through the Blaine Young BOCC and nothing about that board was user-friendly or attached to the community-at-large. (Click herefor more on that.) Did this “fiscal conservative” even consider the cost of switching back to a system that made sense when we were a small rural county, but is no longer adequate for our current needs? Which is the very reason we decided to change the system!
Anyway, having the county divided into districts and each electing their own representation makes this, in fact, more representational –connected to the community at large, if you will–and more user-friendly. If we have a concern, we can just bring a balloon bouquet to our very own council member. Or one of the at-large members, if it suits our fancy. Only evil clowns will be bringing balloons to one of the at-large members, and we know which of the two is already receiving balloon greetings from the random public. That’s right, former Councilman Nameless is just the random public now. Clearly it really hurts!
Perhaps this is all sour grapes since he couldn’t even win the Republican primary to get the County Executive nomination! Whatever the reason, this is all a bunch of nonsense. Does he really expect that if we were go back to the old system he and his buddies would win? Has he not been paying attention to the new voter registration numbersaround these here parts? What a colossal waste of everyone’s time, money, and energy!
Creating a movement entitled Frexit isn’t surprising from someone who posts and does things like this:
Some days we consider writing a screenplay about all our characters around Frederick. Maybe we’ll even call it Frexit! You seriously cannot make this stuff up!
You only have to search our archives to see how ecstatic everyone was when both Billy and Kirby were knocked out in the last primary. It was a relief to us all at Yokel Headquarters to be able to take a break. Because, as those of you who have been with us since the beginning know, it was a bit much to keep up with these two. Unfortunately, these nutters have come back onto our radar lately. And of course it isn’t for anything good.
Let’s start with Kirby. Sometimes we don’t know if we should be angry with him or just feel sorry for him. Whichever it is, he’s stepped out from just being an online troll and posting ignorant tripe such as
To becoming a real life troll who creepily leaves balloons on Kai Hagen’s office door:
Picture this whole scene for a moment. Kirby goes to the trouble of going to a store and purchasing said balloons. Then he drives to Downtown Frederick, walks into Winchester Hall (who is letting him wander around unsupervised?), and leaves the balloons on Kai Hagen’s door. What a weirdo, and we mean this seriously, “Does Kirby need help?”
But in all seriousness, banning balloon releases are a good thing. Many jurisdictions all over the country have banned them. Here’s a good infographic for those that can’t be bothered to read:
Or if you need something a bit more graphic:
Grow up Kirby. This is low even for you.
And then there is this amazing doofus:
First of all, does that youngster in the middle look like he really likes Trump, or does he look like he is about to bust a gut messing with these fools? Because we thought they looked like they were having a grand old time yanking the self-avowed deplorables’ chain. Who can say for sure…
And then there’s this issue. Apparently it troubles him not a whit that his #FakeNews site is *obviously* full of covfefe if they are publishing a photo taken by some unfortunate soul–who knows Billy socially–in Frederick and pretending it is people in Iowa. They must have a rigorous fact checking system! Heavens to Betsy! A brighter person would note that enormous red flag that their news source is entirely unreliable. “How unreliable?” might you ask the handy dandy Media Bias Fact Check? And we solemnly swear that they will also say Daily Kos and HuffPo need some independent verification as well (and Jimminy Christmas, stop sharing Natural Newson the internet already, people!)
In short, these two characters are dumb. Very, very dumb.
Joy to the World, they’re not in office! Let us rejoice each day!
We keep trying to move on. Kirby is irrelevant right now, but an alert reader tipped us off to this gem idiocy.
Me thinks this is foresight of Kirby’s own epitaph.
As Elijah Cummings lies in State today we can only imagine that he wouldn’t even give two hoots about some two-bit has been’s lame tweet. What a bold statement from someone who made national news for not understanding the first amendment.
Cummings was a religious man who spoke with eloquence. We are not religious over here at the Yokel, but have a hard time understanding how anyone could think God would place Elijah Cummings in the category of a swamp member who needs to be drained. What’s that saying about God calling people home for a higher purpose? We’ll just leave you with the congressman’s own words. “You must have confidence in your competence,”… “Most people who are hating on you, they are not worried about where you are. They’re worried about where you’re going.”
Hello folks! We’ve been taking a little break here since the only wrench in our council at the moment is Phil Dacey, and everyone else seems to be keeping a lid on that mess. Anyhoo, we have heard rumblings about him wanting to seek higher office, and with his Michael Hough/ALEC mimicry in full force we don’t doubt it. So, we promise to help keep an eye on that one for ya!
Speaking of politicians, or at least aspiring ones, we’ve had a few chuckles reading about the exploits of some of our former characters. Let’s start with #kirbydelauter. Apparently, Kirby has been filling his time by accepting a position on the board of the Frederick County Conservative Club (stop laughing, this is a serious group y’all!). This group was born out of a deep seated frustration that local Republicans voted for some candidates that some other Republicans didn’t like. There was lots and lots of bad blood, and good stuff for us to read. Well, in the FNP’s Political Notes column we read about some fun times between this group and the already established Frederick Republican Club:
A spokesman for the Frederick County Conservative Club demanded an apology from a former Republican candidate for County Council for a Facebook comment he made regarding Kirby Delauter, a former county councilman.
Danny Farrar, who ran for an at-large seat last year, called Delauter a “D—–bag” who “can straight talk to anybody but himself” on Frederick County Fact Check, a left-leaning political Facebook page, earlier this month.
That prompted a video response from James Grose, spokesman for the Frederick County Conservative Club, established last August.
Grose asked Farrar to either apologize to Delauter in that video, or step down from the Frederick County Republican Club.
“Bashing known conservatives, who have spent 8 years of their life dedicating it to Frederick County, and tons of their money, and helping other people … is that really how a board member should be acting?” Grose asked.
Farrar said he resigned from the Republican Club roughly three weeks ago, before he commented about Delauter on social media.
Do we have to point out the hypocrisy in all this? If a board member of a club needs to adhere to a certain decorum, then how about an elected official? Let’s take a little stroll down memory lane. Do we all remember the time Kirby called David Gray a moron? Or how about the time he said on the radio that Bud Otis had his head up the County Executive’s skirt and that Bud better tread lightly around him? Or take a look at this recent exchange between him and a turned-off voter in which he called her a POS:
And, ICYMI, here’s a post we wrote that shows some of the bad blood between Farrar and Delauter. All due to the fact that Farrar threw his support behind Regina Williams, instead of Kirby. The faux outrage over this whole incident has really been a sight to behold.
Our next Faux Outrage Practitioner is none other than Cindy Rose (T-Thrice failed BoE candidate). She’s really upset that Dr. Lois Jarman, who made a funny acronym about her and her hate slate on our page, was about to be appointed to the BoE. First she wrote a letter to the editor, that mentioned yours truly. Here’s our favorite part:
On March 14, 2018, while running for delegate to represent the people of District 4, Ms. Jarman took time out of her campaign to post on the Facebook page FC Local Yokel under a post about my inability to read data: “We need to make sure that the HERPies or the slate of hate does not make it to the general election. Let’s nip this in the bud in June!”
It’s one thing to disagree with a person’s ideology; it’s quite another to compare them to a venereal disease in a public forum. The Board of Education has already reprimanded and censured two sitting members for abuse of social media. One infraction was so egregious that a member of the Maryland State Education Association was fired for her part in it.
Then she took her outrage to the noodley appendage, where she demanded an apology from Dr. Jarman. Aint’ that rich?!?!
Ms. Jarman displayed a level of unprofessionalism and incivility rarely seen, even in today’s very divisive climate.
During the council’s public comments on Ms. Jarman’s appointment, M. C. Keegan-Ayer, council president, reported that Ms. Jarman apologized for her bad choice in making such a statement. She didn’t apologize for posting it, she apologize for the “choice” she made in posting.
On January 22, 2019, I wrote to Ms. Jarman and welcomed her to the Board of Education.
I also felt compelled to ask her about her commitment to education since the public was denied the opportunity to vet her. The questions I asked:
As a militant advocate of LGBT matters and past attendee of the racist, bigoted Women’s March, I want to know if you plan on sticking to matters that involve local public education, or if you plan to pursue, along with other progressive members of the BoE, a political agenda?
Do you plan on running in 2020 to keep this position?
If you do and you earn your seat, will you abandon it in two years like Mr. Kerr, to seek a higher office?
What is your position on Policy 443? (The policy that allows boys into girl’s bathrooms.)
As of this writing no apology, nor the answers to my questions, have been forthcoming.
You can just go ahead and put her name in our search engine and see all of her social media transgressions. But, we guess that’s different.
We kinda feel cheated here. We thought there was going to be at least one more meeting for us to narrate, one more chance to wax nostalgic about these long four years. However, since Bud wisely decided to allow the next council to make a decision on the Monocacy River Plan, it is over. We are not about to let Kirby, Billy, and Tony leave without one last post! We’ve worked way too hard over this last term to just let them slink away under the cover of darkness.
We dove into the old Yokel archives to come up with a top five list for each of our least favorite FORMER (ah man, that feels good to type) council members!
Let’s start with Tony. Our biggest problem with him was his condescension towards the women on the council and Jan in particular. We’ve also heard that there are those down in Winchester Hall who are very happy they no longer have to put up with his mansplaining ways! Take a look back to when he tried to mansplain something that wasn’t even happening!!!
Every budget season Tony liked to compare the county budget to his very own small business. You know since Tony hasn’t made enough money to give his workers a raise, the county should operate along the same lines! Here’s a trip down memory lane to remind y’all just how long-winded and off course he could be.
Remember when Tony introduced the off-track betting bill and tried to tell us it was open to any restaurant ? We smelled a rat and decided to take Kirby’s advice to follow the money and guess what? We discovered it wasn’t really open to all! All kinds of fun!
What he will be most remembered for is launching his miserably failed write-in campaign! Sour grapes anyone?
It’s difficult to narrow down the list for Kirby as he gave us way too much material to work with. What we will remember most is his alternative budgets he would write every year. Budgets he had no authority to write, which often made no sense, and just wound up wasting everyone’s time. Go ahead and click here and here.
In more recent news, Kirby was NOT happy that he lost in the Republican primary for CE. And he wasn’t going down quietly. He specifically charged Danny Farrar with high crimes and misdemeanors for daring to campaign with Regina Williams. He also called a private citizen a POS for daring to go against him. Even the High Sheriff got called out! If you missed it, it is a MUST see.
No Kirby countdown is complete without mention of the flowchart. It is truly the greatest thing we’ve ever seen. When it first came to your Lady Yokel’s attention, we were gasping for air trying to breathe. All these years later it still brings a smile to our face.
Oh Billy, Billy, Billy. The most ineffectual of all of our first county council members. What he’ll probably most be remembered for is for his uncreative use of the word ABSTAIN. Billy thought since they didn’t have their own budget whisperer (despite them having the entire county budget department available to answer any questions) he could just take the next four years off. We still find it amusing that the person he and Kirby wanted as their budget person ran against Kirby in the CE primary, and according to Kirby ruined everything for him. The drama of Frederick County politics! You never know when someone is going to turn against ya!
There was a whole bunch of wedding venue drama associated with Billy. He didn’t care if a structure was deemed unsafe by the Fire Marshall and could have potentially killed a bunch of high school kids. He didn’t care if the people operating said wedding venue had the proper permits or if they even asked the people who actually owned the land if they could host weddings and parties. NONE of that mattered to him. It was quite a sight to behold, watching him trying to rationalize all this nonsense.
Billy’s rude behavior was a constant thorn in our side. He’s adopted the Trump way of speaking because : 1. He can’t think for himself, and 2. He reacts in anger when he doesn’t understand what is going on. Which was quite often. Here’s an example of when Billy took that anger out on one of our favorite county employees, Lori Depies.
What we will most remember about good ole Billy Shreve is the time he told the world that there are people on both sides of the human trafficking issue. He then proceeded to vote against every human trafficking bill that came before the council. Really folks, what kind of person votes against trying to stop human trafficking?
We’ll see how much we have to say with the new council. Things are looking pretty sane so far. Thank y’all for paying attention and voting these jokers out. We don’t need this type of legislating in our fine county!
Anyhoo, without a hint of irony Kirby shows us everything that is wrong with the Republican party and a incoherent philosophy in these here times. In his first breath he claims:
“I made up my mind weeks ago that if I lost, I’d support Earl,” Delauter said. “I like that he’s laid-back, and he sees things that need to be addressed and wants to address them. I think he has Frederick County’s best interests in mind.”
Oh really? Was Earl going to drop out if Kirby won? Hmmm. Well, after stating that he would not back the chosen Republican for CE, he goes on to lament the lack of unity himself!
The party has not done a good job of presenting a unified front locally, or at the federal level, Delauter said. He pointed to President Donald Trump “doing everything he said he would do,” but still not getting full support among Republicans as an example of that.
“That’s the one thing Democrats have always done a really good job of that the Republican Party really hasn’t,” he said. “If the Democrats had someone like Trump, who came through on everything he said he’d do, they’d be totally behind them. I don’t know why Republicans haven’t.”
So right after telling us all that he will not help in unifying the local ticket, he laments the lack of unity nationally? How do ideas work again?
We came across this wonderful article about the meltdown of the Congressional Republicans that truly reflects what is wrong with the party today. Do we even have to point out the startlingly lack of awareness Kirby possesses to not understand why people would not support Trump? Of course not!
This whole debacle also reminded us of a skit on Dave Chapelle’s show years ago. Charlie Murphy, Eddie’s brother, would do a segment entitled “Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories.” In one segment he described how Rick James came over to Eddie’s house and smeared mud all over his white couch. In the same sentence Rick James both denied and admitted to doing so!
Really people. You cannot both lament and support doing the same action. That’s not how any of this works! But it is fun to watch!
It’s hard to believe that people are anything but outraged by children being taken from their parents. We here at the Yokel have been sick over it. We all have little ones and cannot imagine what these people are going through. If you are thinking, “Well, it’s their parents fault,” or “Obama did it too,” go away now! We are done with the likes of you!
Even though Trump has finally signed an Executive Order to overturn his very own policy, which he insisted he wasn’t able to do because it was a Democratic law, the question remains as to when the already separated children will be reunited with their parents. That’s the only thing anyone with a heart should be worried about.
However….we live in a crazy world. And we have some people running for office who have some interesting interpretations of what we should be worried about instead of the obvious.
Something is disgusting all right! If she would have taken half a second to fact check this picture she would have found out it was taken at a protest about children being held in cages, not someone staging a picture of kids being held in cages.
Because there are plenty of real pictures of that. But, that’s not what this BOE candidate wants us to focus on is it? By posting this she’s insinuating that this whole story isn’t true. Snopes is your friend, Cindy. If you can’t bother to check the validity of a simple picture how can we possibly trust you to make fact-based decisions concerning our children’s education?
How does Kirby feel about all this hullabaloo? Take a look:
Hey folks! Why are we spending so much time focusing on the deep psychological scars that these separated kids will endure when we can engage in some deceiving whataboutism?
There are no sanctuary policies letting criminals out of jail. That is just a lie. Just like all the lies his Dear Leader tells. We just love how both he and Jenkins love to use MS-13 and illegal immigrants in the same breath in order to associate them together as one. Ain’t that clever? Go ahead and read up on MS-13, yes they are bad, but you may learn a thing or two. Like they are an American born gang, their victims are most likely to be other gang members, and illegal immigrants actually commit less crimes than native born people. We’ll stick to talking about Trump’s immigration policies thank you very much.