Billy is a boil on the butt of this county government! Your April 10th “we can’t take this much longer” meeting run-down.


We can’t say enough terrible things about Billy due to his abhorrent behavior during this entire meeting! Just about the worst we’ve ever seen, and you know that must mean something coming from the likes of us! Let’s get right down to it.

The council recognizes the achievements of the Frederick High basketball team, which is nice to see! Shannon Moore is on site to present some changes that need to be made to the sustainability commission. We are waiting for Kirby to trigger when it comes to the discussion of changes that need to be made to the ethics law, but instead Billy takes up the cause! County Attorney Linda Thall explains that when the state makes changes to the ethics law, the county must follow suit. Such changes have to do with former lobbyists and what they can and cannot do if hired by the county,not using your political office to secure campaign donations, and increases to  fines shall a candidate fail to adhere to a reporting deadline. Well, Billy has thoughts! He demands Ms. Thall tell him how we can realistically “upgrade” the ethics law if we don’t change the Public Information Act (PIA)! He is explained to that the PIA is a state law and the county cannot change a state law. But, but, Billy then claims there are no fines if the government doesn’t comply. Well, that is also not true. Billy knows all kinds of “citizens” who aren’t receiving the information they requested in a timely fashion. Oh we bet he does!

Bud then introduces a bill regarding county council staff compensation. Billy wants to know why only 10 people are listed. Bud tells him that is because that is what is allowed by their current budget. Now hold on to your hats folks because you are not going to believe what comes out of Billy’s mouth next! Billy wants to hire an independent consultant to evaluate the council’s productiveness. Because hey folks, Billy just wants to leave the council in a better place than it is now!

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You’ve killed Smokey, Billy!

We’ll wait for you to pick yourself up from the floor first before we continue.

Now. M.C. tells Billy that all the information he wants on the council is already available, and she doesn’t see the sense in paying someone to tell them what they already know. Jessica, M.C., and Jerry hall have issues with this bill because of the proposed at-will employee provision. So, we’ll have to keep an eye on this one as it travels down the legislative road!

This is the section of the meeting where things get really, really bad. Lori Depies, Finance Director of Frederick County, is present to ask the council to reconsider Billy’s very bad bill that passed last week. Bill 18-03, Elderly Individual & Retired Military Tax Credit has lots and lots and lots of problems!!! Who could have guessed that Billy would write such a horrible piece of legislation? And that Tony, Bud, and Kirby would just go right along with it?

Who could have guessed?

There’s so much wrong with this bill, we can’t even start to list it all. The most egregious and talked about point is there was no effective date listed. There also was no application deadline, procedures on how to apply, renewal requirements, just all around very poorly executed. Ms. Depies makes the point over and over that it would be impossible for this bill to take effect this year because: a. they have no procedures in place to implement this tax credit that quickly and b. the budget is already in place for this year and this would cause a $1.7 million hit.

Billy has statements. Even though the finance department was never invited to participate in this bill, they did send a fiscal note that Jessica brought up last week, that Billy of course paid no attention to. Nevertheless, he very rudely asks Ms. Depies two times if she ever reached out to him personally. As though it is the responsibility of the finance department to contact a legislator when they are working on a piece of legislation! Ms. Depies informs him, that per council procedures county staff has to be invited to the table to give input to the council. Something Billy certainly did not do! Billy then wants to know if they legally have to do this. Ms. Depies tells him she cannot give him a legal opinion to which he shouts: “It’s just your opinion then!” “No”, the unflappable Ms. Depies replies, “It is my expert opinion as the Finance Director”.

But, seriously folks, is this where we are now as a county? Every idiot’s opinion should hold equal weight with those that actually have experience and expertise? Shall we be kept awake during surgery in order to give our doctors our opinion on how to operate? Is this where we are headed?

Jessica says that these concerns are exactly why she didn’t vote for the bill in the first place! Billy interrupts her by saying, “Why didn’t you write amendments?” Jessica tells him that first of all, it isn’t my job to write your legislation, and secondly during the workshop it was very clear that you were not open to any changes!  Jerry points out that not having an effective date on the bill is reason enough to reconsider the whole darn thing. Tony wants us all to know he was on a skid-loader when he got the message that this bill was going to be reconsidered, so he’s working at a disadvantage here. But, that doesn’t stop him from asking a ton of questions.

Billy tries one more time to save his very bad bill. He just wants it to go through and then add a replacement bill later, which makes no sense. The lawyer says that this doesn’t address the problem that the Finance Director just made about the procedures and the budget shortfall. Billy then says that Bud was beaten into submission to bring this up tonight. However, when voting time comes EVERYONE but Billy agrees this bill should be reconsidered.

Billy is the sole no vote to go into closed session.

Now it’s time for the public hearing portion of the evening.

Another bad Billy bill is back for public hearing. You know the one from last week that Tony did the work for?  Ray Barnes is the only public speaker and he reiterates the administration’s position that they are against this bill because there are many other non-profits who do good work for the community and the county executive doesn’t want everyone  applying for a tax break. Well, Billy just says that he will put forth a bill for any organization that contacts him. Genius at work!

We can barely stand to write about this wood-chipping bill any longer. Ray Barnes says the administration is still against it because they don’t feel that a wood-waste facility belongs in the General Commercial (GC) zone. But the star of this evenings testimony is Mr. Bussard, proprietor of said wood-waste business. Jessica asks him if this bill addresses his issues, his response? “Will it get the county off my butt?” Now, that’s the kind of testimony your Yokel gals like to hear! He admits to not understanding the legalize of the bill and admits that he actually gets along great with the county. At least with those that work behind the wheel. He also informs us that: 1. He’s never received a fine and 2. He’s looking to move his business anyway. Kirby then feels the need to apologize for the county. He’s so very sorry that the county followed their zoning laws and actually investigated a business that WAS violating said laws. He called it “the most ridiculous thing he has ever witnessed.” Well, hearing him use those words was kind of the most ridiculous thing we ever had to witness, so I guess we are all even now! Billy ends out the discussion by saying that county workers are generally good people, but they have some kind of block here.

Guess who that’s directed at!

In good news, Jerry and Kirby have come together to combine their Senior tax credit bills! Jerry made no secret of the agreement:

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For some reason we couldn’t find any similar announcement on Kirby’s page. Wonder why.

Tonight’s discussion ends with M.C.’s new bill about amenities that are just for HOA members being required to be located within a development. Looks like there will be some more discussion on this one before it’s all ironed out.

Don’t forget, gentle readers, Billy believes he should represent our interests in Annapolis. Can you imagine the state-wide embarrassment this would bring us? Local elections matter y’all!

On Monday, April 16th the council will hold a hearing on the BOE budget. If you care about public education, and you know you do, show up or email the council to give them your thoughts!

It’s your April 10th drinking game!

You too?

We are not even sure if anyone is able to stay sober right now. Therefore, if you are already drunk due to the national news, just carry on with your selected beverage of choice.  Grab your agenda and follow along.

There are no minutes to vote on tonight, so you can spare your liver right away because Billy won’t have the option to abstain.

First up are 3 bill updates. And oh dear, one has to do with ethics. Remember how Kirby gets triggered whenever the “E” word comes up? If you see #NeverKirbyforCountyExecutive get all twitchy, slam back a pitcher of Trigger!

The council then goes into closed session, a motion that Silly Billy will surely vote against. They return at 7:00 for a variety of public hearings.

First up is Billy’s very bad bill that Tony had to re-write so it made a modicum of sense. And speaking of Tony, we need to digress for a moment because people have you seen this?!:

This is his campaign sign!!! So many thoughts…First of all, are we building a wall? Starting a trade war with Washington or Montgomery counties? When does Frederick County not come first in the Frederick County Council?! Zeus give us strength this election season. And, vote for Steve McKay in the primary if you are a Republican District 2 voter.

The next hearing is the wood chipping bill, and boy are we tired of hearing about this! Tony added some amendments last time, actually took some of the planning commission and county executive’s suggestions into consideration!  Still, why are we making legislation that benefits one business? If “anyone” talks about Jan shutting down all the businesses ( YOKEL FACT: This business was never shut down or even fined!) set up a row of Pink Faced Liar shots!

We next have to sit through two hearings on the same issue. Tis an election year and Kirby needs to grandstand over all his failed bills and budget writing attempts. We know who has the better bill, so sit back and set up your moonshine still, because man you’re gonna need it this year.

We round up the evening with M.C.’s bill about locating amenities within the boundaries of a particular community. If When Billy says something condescending (we know the nerve of that fella) take dainty sips of your Raspberry Stupid.



Let’s reverse the roles! The first half of the county council meeting proves Billy needs to retire.



Let’s see here, Billy was on the BOCC for four years,  has been on the council for over three, and still cannot figure out what he’s doing up there! We really need to add an impeachment clause to the county charter. Seven years is way too long to let incompetence reign. Let’s get down to the nitty gritty of tonight’s meeting:

Billy votes FOR the agenda, which kinda goes against his whole philosophy of voting AGAINST it. Did he have a change of heart or just forgot? We’ll let you be the judge.

Dr. Alban is recognized for receiving the 2018 Tom Cookerly Exceptional School Superintendent Leadership Award. This award recognizes those who do a lot for the neediest kids in their school system. Even though poverty does tend to be concentrated at some FCPS schools, our county has a dedicated coordinator at every school to help families in need! Way to go FCPS and Dr. Alban!

Our favorite public commenter, Melanie Cox, is in the house to voice the League of Women Voters’ support of the Adequate Public Facilities bill which will have a public hearing on May 1st.

Billy is back in form abstaining on the budget adjustments and minutes, while everyone else says aye or yes, depending on their knowledge of Robert’s Rules.

All vote yes for the appointment of Kevin Fox to the Department of Fire Services.

Four bills have their third reading.

Bill 18-01, which will increase the mandated general fund, is passed 7-0. Jerry makes the comment that this bill will keep us on a strong financial path.

Then it’s time for the first of Billy’s two bills this evening. Billy first has to be prompted to make a motion on this bill because going through this at least a bazillion times hasn’t been enough for him to learn how things work. Jerry, Jessica, and M.C. all have concerns about this bill because it requires people to live in their residence for 40 years, only lasts for 5 years, and has no income requirement! M.C. makes the point that the existing bill is better.  Tony is okay if it only affects 30 people which prompts Billy to make the following declaration : “Any tax credit is a good one!” The bill goes along party lines, then it is Bud’s turn. After a loooong pause he votes Aye. So, Billy’s poorly written tax credit passes.

Next up is Billy’s second bill, which had to be re-written by Tony because it is sooo poorly wrongly worded. In Billy’s original bill the Fire Department is exempted from ANY and ALL FEES. When Jessica points this out and asks if this means water and sewer, landfill, etc. Billy so rudely says that she is the ONLY one who would interpret those words that way. Jessica then retorts that the fiscal note that they ALL received points out this fact! Clearly, she is not the only one. Jerry doesn’t like it because it gives the fire departments an unfair advantage in getting customers into their Fire Hall and he isn’t comfortable “picking the winners and losers!”  Isn’t that usually Billy and Kirby’s phrase?! Tony and Kirby both declare their love for the free market, Tony even admits that he may be a hypocrite here, but hey tis the way of the party lately. When our guy does it, it’s okay! Well, the language is the problem, because guess what? Billy only meant for this to apply to fees for new construction and renovations for the fire halls! WHO KNEW? Literally no one but Billy!

As a legislator you better know how to write legislation!! And this guy wants us to send him to Annapolis?!

This portion of the evening features an amusing exchange between Billy and Jerry. Jerry is comparing different wedding venues and Billy demands to know the last time Jerry was in the market for a wedding venue. Billy tells Jerry that if he doesn’t know what he’s talking about he should just remain quiet. Jerry retorts with a “that’s never stopped you before!” Billy says that’s because he usually knows what he’s talking about. That elicits a laugh from both Jerry and your Lady Yokels!!!

It is amazing the lack of introspection this guy possesses!!

Kirby jumps in to tell us he eloped, but likes the free market, but whatevs.  Billy lectures us about how all bills have unintended consequences and we will have to fix it in the future. He adds: It’s the way the world works! Thanks Billy, but we aren’t taking any philosophical advice from the likes of you!

Since an amendment was added, which Tony wrote, the bill goes back to public hearing.

Tony adds four amendments to his woodchipping bill, taking recommendations from the planning commission and the county executive. Therefore that has to go back to public hearing as well.

Three public hearings are up at 7:00 this evening. We’ll let you know how that all turns out when we get the chance!


Let’s celebrate the head of FCPS! Your county council is back tonight!

The last legislative meeting of the county council was put on hold due to weather. Will Spring ever arrive, Yokels?! There’s lots on the agenda this evening including the recognition of Dr. Alban’s leadership award! We know that some wanna be school board members will balk at this, but the rest of us will celebrate!


Lots of third readings as well as public hearings. A couple of Billy’s really bad bills haven’t made their way back on the docket, which is just fine with us! This election has really put a lot of demands on our time and we haven’t been able to come up with a proper drinking game. We will leave you with this Bingo card, for it truly is timeless:


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Let that liquor keep you warm! Your snowy day council council drinking game!

Tonight’s meeting is a two-parter! First we begin at 4:30 with a variety of fun items to keep you on your toes. There are five bills to be voted on tonight, many of them originating from our pal Billy Shreve. The original agenda had six bills on, but we’ll let this story from the FNP explain why one of Billy’s very bad vendetta bills was removed from consideration.



We reconvene at 7:00 to listen to three public hearings. Two of which have to do with changes to the Senior Tax Credit. Use the below bingo card as your game this evening. Make up your own runs or follow the traditional bingo. Guard your liver though, none of these local characters are worth the destruction of a major organ.

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Your double meeting Yokel report!!!

Well, it wasn’t quite that dramatic Sparky!

Yesterday, the county council had a workshop. The first part of the workshop was a hearing on the proposed MXD bill. Only one person came to speak. The gentleman was a lawyer speaking on behalf of St. John’s Properties. He believes this bill would short circuit the entire zoning process. He also believes that it is unfair to tenants and homeowners who had previously bought their property or set up their businesses in this area. As do we! Contrary to what Billy told us the last meeting, this gentleman lets the council know that it is NOT a good idea to just pass this now and fix whatever problems come up later. That’s just not good legislating!

The majority of the workshop is devoted to budget information. Esteemed Budget Director, Rick Harcum, is in the house to talk about all the different options he is willing to give the council on the budget, as far ahead as possible, so they are able to to have any and all information to do their jobs! Will Billy still complain, abstain,  and say they need their own budget analyst?  Is the ocean wet?

Anyhoo, the meeting has a lot of presentations from various departments within the county, which we didn’t have time to listen to. The evening ends with a report on A Better Maryland that you can read about here.

This evening we had the shortest meeting in the history of forever!


No public comment at either end of the meeting. Billy votes against the agenda and abstains from the minutes. County Attorney, Michael Chomel, is present to have the council sign the Ballenger Run PUD. Then, Bud pulls his MXD bill! Apparently without any notice to any of his other council members! It seems to us that he could have just canceled the entire meeting since this was the only reason for the meeting to begin with! But that’s for his fellow council members to argue.

We close out with council member comments. Tony and Kirby pass. Jerry wants the public to contact him so he has the necessary information in case this MXD bill is brought back. He also wants everyone to know how successful the senior tax credit information sessions have been! Billy promotes his Classmates 4 Life, telling us that this is how kids are learning that drugs are bad! Jessica is willing to work with anyone who wants to make a new MXD bill, as does M.C. Bud is surprised that everyone is willing to work together and since some people, and he’s not naming names, were unwilling to help him with this.

Until next week folks!