Where the sidewalk ends (in Emmitsburg)

If you saw our post about this week’s budget amendment circus, you know already that Kirby put forth an amendment to slash a grant funding sidewalk improvements in Emmitsburg by 40%; he claimed they wouldn’t need it all, because he was going to take care of the portion in front of his business. M.C. Keegan-Ayer said she was uncomfortable supporting the amendment without hearing from the mayor. Has she got his number, or what?! Because lo and behold, The Frederick News Post reports today that the mayor was a bit surprised that this amendment passed (the only of this year’s catalog of fantasy budget cut amendments that passed), because he didn’t think this proposal was doable. Read it for yourself here.

(Fun fact: if you Google “Frederick News Post Kirby Delauter” the first hit that comes up is the greatest op-ed piece of all time from when Kirby threatened to sue Bethany Rodgers for using his name in the paper. Lolololololol. It’s still funny. We do wonder what we will all point and laugh at when Billy and Kirby are finally kicked to the curb. Probably some other gem who acts like he escaped from The Silver Linings Playbook will run for mayor or something. We don’t even know what to hope for. Be careful what you wish for…as the song goes.)

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Now we don’t really know what Jerry Donald intended to do when he said he would defer to Kirby since he represents the Council District Emmitsburg is in. It seemed like a “please proceed [at your own risk]” maneuver from the Local Yokel sofa perspective. Maybe we imagine these things are performance art when they are not.

There is an update to this tale where Kirby explains to the Frederick News Post later this afternoon that he never got the email that Mayor Briggs didn’t want to proceed with the Kirby/Emmitsburg Sidewalk Enhancement Cooperative where Kirby paves the way in front of his business. Make of this what you will, just as we have (DIY CYA?). Hopefully Emmitsburg gets its sidewalks and a better Councilperson in 2018.

What is even going on here?

Time to pay some attention to the Democratic Primary for At-Large Council race! We have four great candidates: Kai Hagen, Mark Long, Susan Reeder Jessee, and Kavonte Duckett. Oh… and Galen Clagett. Notice how his name isn’t linked to anything? That’s because there isn’t anything to link to! No Facebook page, no website, no indication anywhere that the guy is even running!!! What year is this again?

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We know Bandit! It’s preposterous!

At last evening’s candidate’s forum, Galen accused fellow candidate Kai Hagen of throwing out a “cheap shot” because Kai had the nerve to bring up things that Galen actually did! Take a look:

 

Guess what Mr. Clagett? Knowing Blaine as a child is not a good enough justification to support him as county executive! Especially after all he did during his reign as BOCC President. Your claims of voting in your business’ interests are also unimpressive.Why don’t we take a look at that letter he sent out to his fellow Democrats back in 2014:

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WOW!!!! And straight from Kirby Delauter’s website (Yes, he has one!):

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Choose wisely come June 26. #localelectionsmatter!

 

 

 

 

 

Where in the world is the High Sheriff? Oh crap…

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We are so very sorry to tell you that the High Sheriff Chuck Jenkins made an appearance on Fox and Friends this morning, giving the impression to the world that Frederick County would like to see Trump’s wall built! You can watch the whole thing here:

 

Or follow along with our their sensationalized story in pictures!

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Are you scared yet? And we don’t want to make light of the real problem that this gang poses in some places, however, we do not subscribe to Jenkin’s boogey man characterization of this problem! Especially since we have more pressing issues in Frederick County.

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Jenkins is very concerned about the lady members of this group. According to him they are more violent than the males AND he fears that they will not be punished for their crimes due to their lady parts! True facts!

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This is the part of the program in which Jenkins tells us that if Congress would just get off its ass and build the wall and let ALL of Trump’s immigrations policies through then MS-13 would disappear like the Wicked Witch of the West!

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We just had to include those last two screenshots to show you the disgusting, fear-mongering coverage this network spews out into the world. Remember we have the chance to elect a new sheriff this November. We need a sheriff focused on local issues, not trying to kiss Donald Trump’s tuchus on national television. #localelectionsmatter

 

Annual tradition: fantasy budget cuts

In case you are new here, every year Kirby comes up with “fat” that we can trim from the budget (also Tony and Billy, but mostly Kirby) in the form of unicorn and rainbows amendments. He proposes a bunch of stuff without knowing really what this money does or what happens when we take it away. Like today when we tried to cut the money for library staff at Walkersville and Myersville. Oopsie-daisy-dummy. (Failed) Sometimes he has to pull his own amendments because he didn’t know what they were. Weird how that happens.

Just as long as you don’t become the County Executive, do whatever.

We breezed onto the scene right about the time Billy tried to suspend the rules and let The Yellow T-Shirt Brigade take over. We expected shenanigans and malarkey, because Billy was involved, but in reality this was the Career Firefighters’ Association, and their presence there and contributions everywhere are very much appreciated by Local Yokels and all of our friends everywhere. We are very pleased that our assumptions are wrong, because they were somewhat dark, based upon Billy’s Twitter feed and the black hole of intellect that can drag a yokel into. On the upside, Billy Shreve’s State Senate page only has 35 likes, so we may be free of his torment soon.

Something like this scene occurred (text transcript)

Kirby just got petulant because they don’t want to cut $$ for MET to go do theater programs at schools with high percent FARM (that’s free and reduced meals, if you don’t know the lingo) lunch kids because they had no problem voting down a quarter mil for Classical Charter.
M.C.’s reply: We haven’t voted on that yet.
Kirby: Well, the last two years!
Yokel text: Oh my God. You know what we should do? Find the post we wrote about his amendments last year and see if it matches up. Just to prove what a dead horse beater he is!
Man, oh man. Even the broken sidewalk budget cuts are part of the historical record! (Tonight Kirby explained that he had made a handshake deal with the mayor of Emmitsburg and he’s going to split the cost of the sidewalk repairs. M.C. was as uncomfortable as we would have been not knowing whether or not Mr. Mayor had agreed to this, but Jerry counseled that it was Kirby’s D and if he didn’t want to fix the sidewalks one way or the other, that would be his problem in the end. So fine. That all works out spiffy.)
But enough about Kirby, because Tony Chmelik got in a complete snit over $45,000 for an administration position in the Office of Economic Development. Since they’ve been doing a grand old job, even though they haven’t filled a position, but have needed to for four years, it’s obviously fine to continue overworking people there who are covering that shift, so to speak. Surely nobody who is doing extra work all the damn time will find a new job where they don’t have to put up with that. Right, Billy and Kirby? Suggestion: you volunteer your time, just like teachers do when they are grading and planning and documenting after school and on weekends, and sacrifice pay for being useless human bookends to the council since you apparently earn money for other things that you do in life. The pay of two marginally sentient council persons will cover one administrator in the OED. Problem solved! Also, tons of egregious mansplaining from Tony Chmelik here. The Lady Yokels felt that Helen Propheter was a particular heroine tonight, because who wants to be treated like that IN PUBLIC for their job? Nobody. Billy and Kirby also had “contributions” to this discussion in the form of: won’t we need to build all the houses you keep telling us to stop approving? NO. The answer is no. Some people already live here and could work closer to home, and would even like that. Question: what if we just made Jefferson TECH Park make the leap from fiction to nonfiction?
Jessica is a hero tonight, over and over again. Every time Kirby and Tony tried to snip, snap the budget she jumped in, diplomatically, like an excellent teacher, to guide them toward the information showing that they are so very, very wrong. For all her hard work this evening we present her the following award:
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We are also happy to report that Bud landed on the side of county employees by helping to defeat Kirby and Tony’s austerity amendments. Nice to see you back on the team, Bud!

Who’s in need of some remedial Constitution history today?

Top of the morning to ya, Yokels! We are all so hopeful that we will only have to bring this nonsense to you for one more month, since we are super optimistic that the two we are about to discuss will lose their primaries and slink out of the public eye forever. Until that time we must point out how unqualified they are to hold public office in our fine county.

Let us begin with three-time school board contender Cindy Rose. If you go back a couple of years and look at the PIA dump someone published from the last election, you will see that she often laments that the school system doesn’t celebrate Constitution Day. In this post she equates the unfairness of celebrating Earth Day, but not the Constitution, while adding in an interesting twist:

Screen Shot 2018-05-05 at 8.57.38 AMUMMM, their Creator?!?! Does she think the U.S. Constitution was written by the Almighty himself? Sounds like someone could have used Constitution Day herself!! So, we are supposed to erroneously teach our students that “their Creator” bequeathed the Constitution to the American people, but celebrating Mother Earth is some kind of liberal social/environmental justice that needs to end? Was the Lord/Zeus/Allah partial to bicameral legislatures, checks and balances, the 3/5th’s clause? Who knew?!

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Not one of them, including God!

Is this the kind of thinking we want on our school board?

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We’re all going to die if the school system doesn’t teach the Constitution was written by the Almighty!

Yesterday we shared the story the FNP wrote on Kirby’s gun raffle on our Facebook page. He broke the record for using the term “2nd amendment” in a sentence! Then, his campaign manager took to Facebook to lament that anyone had the nerve to ask him about this gun raffle to begin with!

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How dare Kirby be asked his personal opinion! What’s wrong with all you liberal reporters expecting Kirby to explain something he’s actually doing? Oh, and love the old NRA car analogy. What’s the purpose of a car again? What’s the purpose of a gun? How are they the same?

Don’t forget to vote in the primary June 26th! #localelectionsmatter!

Yeah, that’s not happening.

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We brought you a report of the first part of last night’s meeting, but there’s no way we can sit through three hours of public hearings. We’ll point you in the right direction if you wish to keep informed.

First, for a good old chuckle, go to 4:15:08 of last night’s meeting and prepare to have an F bomb dropped on you by Tom Natelli. Accidentally of course, but still hilarious. (We did feel a little bad for him because he turned a bright shade of red and commented that he knew that was going to be played over and over again.)

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Check out Stand Up Frederick’s page for posts that were made live during the meeting. And there’s also an article that ran in this morning’s Frederick News Post. 

Looks like a lot of good citizens were on hand to advocate for change. It will be awhile until all the mistakes of the Young BOCC are undone!

Everyone has had it with Billy! And Kirby is confusing everyone out in Middletown. Your May Day first half of the meeting report!

Due to the craziness of the evening, your Lady Yokels joined the meeting seven minutes late. There was a nice gentlemen from Middletown giving some public comment. Apparently, Kirby contacted the Middletown city manager and constructed some budget amendment that has everyone believing that he wants to cut funding from the new library. After three years of sitting through Kirby’s amendments we are very sympathetic to anyone who has to try and parse them out.

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#TRUTH

After M.C. suggests that Kirby go back and look at his 39th amendment (and my God people are we going to have to sit through HOURS of his amendments again!!!), which he does. He then insists that this amendment only applies to 2019. And look people he’s just trying to look out for the taxpayer!

Billy abstains from both the budget adjustment and the minutes. Good thing we saved your liver from that nonsense this week. 

There is a First Reading on the Frederick County Sustainability Commission that you can read about here.

Then we have three Third Readings to get through. First off is Billy’s bill concerning the Senior/Retired Military tax credit. You know, the one that Tony had to practically re-write for him. Well, Jerry, M.C., and Jessica want an income cap added to this bill. Because not every retired military person is in need of a tax break! Added to that is the fact that every other tax credit has an income cap, but for some reason this one sailed through without one. Probably because there were so many other problems with it! Anyhoo, Billy predictably says that Jerry doesn’t like veterans and old people. To which Jerry replies, “I knew you were going to say something like that!”

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And not in a good way Billy!

Jerry wants the cap to be $80,000, but the bill passes with Bud being the deciding vote, 4-3.

Next up is Tony’s off-track gambling bill. Tony thinks allowing this will help tourism and that horse gambling is different from different kinds of gambling. M.C. is the only one who disagrees and this bill passes 6-1.

The last third reader is the Veteran’s Advisory Council bill and that passes with little fanfare, 7-0.

Now, there are three public hearings. We kind of space out on some of these issues, so you can go ahead and look at these slides regarding the FY 2018 Installment Purchase Application Farm/Land Preservation Program:

 

The top ten applications were approved 7-0.

Next we have a public hearing on the City of Frederick Enterprise Zone on the Golden Mile. The city is the main entity affected by this, but the county plays a part and must also vote for it. The Golden Mile qualifies for this tax program because of the poverty and vacant buildings in that area Anyone who lives here wants to see that strip do well again. Especially since they are going to lose Toys R Us soon. Well, there’s lots of questions from the peanut gallery, but nothing too bad or out of the ordinary. Until Billy…. He ‘finds it interesting” that those who voted against his tax credit bill are for giving ‘Wall Street corporations” tax welfare. But get this people, Billy is also for this credit. Jerry points out that these bills are “different animals altogether” and Jessica points out these are small businesses not Wall Street corporations. Billy tries again to make his point to which Jessica snaps and tells him to keep on with his talking points, maybe one day it will work out for ya!

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Passes 7-0.

The last hearing, before the break, concerns a Petition to Alter County Roads in the Frederick City Watershed. The City of Frederick is trying to alter roads and put up gates in an effort to stop all the illegal dumping that goes on back there. We couldn’t watch the rest of this, so we’ll have to check back on it tomorrow.

Meeting reconvenes at 7:00 for a bunch of public hearings. We predict a big crowd in the house tonight!

#Neverforget, #NeverSenatorShreve

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No, Whiskers, it is not.

We saw this article and guess what? A study has found that one fifth of human trafficking victims are homeless youth. Please read the article, and remember that our very own Billy Shreve once said there are people for human trafficking as if both sides was a valid arguement. If you don’t remember, it is a good thing we are here and we will #neverforget.  Read about it here and here.

Guess what else this research found?

The research also highlights the connection between sex trafficking and online advertising, including Backpage.com, which has recently been shut down by the FBI with federal indictments against the online marketplace. Researchers found that 44 percent of the sex trafficking victims were subjects of an online ad, with half of them reporting that they were advertised on Backpage.

Why is Backpage so familiar??? Have we heard about that website in Frederick for some local reason? Hmmm. Oh, yeah. We read about when a bastion scourge of our community was arrested.  Human trafficking is a real issue. Neither Frederick, nor Maryland needs leaders who are unwilling and unable to understand there are no pros to this issue.

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Use your vote wisely and we can make sure Billy Shreve is not elected. Tell your friends.

May Day meeting: mayday! mayday!

Here is your agenda for May Day’s Sobriety Challenge. There are budget adjustments, and since this is like Cheers, “where everybody knows your name,” we all know who will be oppositional during the regular scheduled business portion up top. It is not worth endangering our blessed livers to drink for this anymore. We will need these in working order just so we can get through the next election.

The first new business pertains to a bill regarding the Frederick County Sustainability Commission. Sustainability sounds like socialism (not really, but whatever certain people don’t like is “the socialist agenda”) so…queue up the histrionics? Take your mayday swig of whatever you have handy if any related slippery slope variety nonsense comes up. Cheap wine straight from a bottle (box/spigot?) seems fitting.

Council decisions will be required for three separate items.

  • Elderly Individual and Retired Military Tax Credit: if Billy Shreve finally accomplishes something…Well, lets not go overboard. This is a good bill, we should make a nice toast, take a sip, and carry on under the informed hypothesis that it will be back to the regularly scheduled B.S.B.S.
  • Off Track Betting: prediction–this will pass easily, based on the prior discussions. Giddy Up! Maybe have a Black-Eyed Susan, which seems hella elitist for video gambling, but we have to spruce things up on occasion, don’t we?
  • Veterans Advisory Council: this better pass, and there’s no reason to think it wouldn’t. Unanimously. Another toast for what happens when government functions cooperatively. If something goes horribly awry, chug the bottle.

Public hearings are scheduled before the break, and after, and this is going to be a lot to digest. We have Installment Purchase Programs, City Enterprise Zone for the Golden Mile, and a Petition to alter county roads in the city watershed. Definitely have some bread and pasta during the break if you’re going to keep up with this game after the break, because first up is Constant Yield, and you must know we are going to get another lesson on how keeping the property tax rate the same is a tax increase because the county will get more money, which one would imagine may make a certain amount of sense, since if they have to purchase any land or anything it is at today’s prices and not yesteryear’s. Suggested solution: finish your glass.

Mayday! Mayday! Math, how does it work?

Thankfully (and miraculously) Kirby and Jerry have done the magical bipartisan duo thing to craft a relief bill to supplement seniors, because their property values are going up, and consequently their tax bill is higher. This is the right idea for legislation, because this is also important for people on fixed incomes. If Kirby toots his own horn for his very lately discovered election season cooperative sensibility…what do we mean, “if…”? When Kirby pats himself on the back, finish that bottle.

Switch to rosé. Gag. Also up for discussion is that whole thing about whether your neighborhood pool/tennis court/community center has to actually be in your neighborhood, if it is to be exclusive to your neighborhood. What kind of special mediocre elite nonsense is this meant to address anyway, anyway? If you want a country club, go join one. FFS. Your bottle was empty after Kirby’s issue above anyway, right? Now you will definitely have a headache in the morning.

And that brings us to Adequate Public Facilities. Rest In Peace.