Tag: Frederick Politics

Better call out sick tomorrow!! Your boozing through the budget drinking game is here!

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Sorry Tiger, if we have to live through it so do you !
It’s that time of the year when everything gets all cray cray! For it is time to discuss the budget!! Last week, Kirby did a repetitive dead horse beating tome on The Tentacle (and only the Tentacle since he’s apparently been banned from everywhere else!). We are naively holding out hope that he will heed  M.C.’s pleas and won’t come up with an alternative budget this year. However, disturbances in the force tell us some non-sensical amendments are sure to be proposed. Hold on to your hats, grab your agendas, and remember that this game is just for fun. If you follow it verbatim, you will die.

An ordinance will be proposed soon that will cut down the number of budget adjustments that come before the council. Oh, how we hope that comes to pass. For we are sick and tired of Shrelauter (and on occasion Tony), arguing over already approved funds being moved to a different category.  Should this occur this time around, throw back a nice tall Captain Hurricane. 

It’s a toss up on whether or not Billy will approve the past minutes. Then we are on to some post-decision wrap up on the Urbana rezone decision. If “anyone” tries to re-argue this application slam back a Hell Freezes Over. Since that’s apparently when all this nonsense will finally end.

Three council decisions on the docket tonight. Farm distilleries and tasting rooms, ethics (uh-oh that’s a Kirby trigger word!), and solar panels. We know folks, Billy told us that solar panels were dead in Frederick County. He also claimed that billboards in Central Pennsylvania were thanking us for murdering them. Alas, he was wrong. If any cross words are exchanged during these votes, make a whole thermos of Jamaica Me Crazy!

These are the times that try men’s souls AKA budget amendment time!

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Now this could go one of two ways; 1. Amendments are proposed that are based on good research with the goal of making Frederick County a safe and vibrant community OR 2. Outlandish amendments are proposed that reflect a misunderstanding of the county charter and the function of county government in general. We predict more of number 2 will be in store for us. If we are some kind of soothsayers, have yourself a pitcher of Angry Possum. If an alternative budget is proposed, mix up a barrel of it!

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Well, how about that? It rhymes!
There is to be a break until 7:00, but somehow we don’t think there will be one.  When (if) the council reconvenes, there is a 2nd reading on a bill to discuss zoning map amendments during an election year. Then there’s a hearing on the constant yield. When the dead horses are flogged on this being a tax hike, sip upon thy Horse Feathers to get yourself through it.

Hopefully the council members have said all they need to and we won’t have dramatic council member comments like we commonly do. Take this time to get yourself a big pail of ice water to stick your head in. Hopefully our new budget will be passed on May 16th.

Release the hounds: It’s budget time in Frederick!

fclocalyokel1 Comment

This evening marks the beginning of budget time in our fair county. At 7:00 the council will hold a hearing on the Board of Education’s operating budget. Do we see dead horse memes in our future? No doubt. Let’s just hope we can have a productive evening without having to yell this at our favorite undynamic duo:

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Yeah, sorry we aren’t listening to four hearings worth of public comment. But we’ll be happy to bring you council member comments!

fclocalyokel2 Comments
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We don’t know how the council members sit for that long!

We won’t listen to comments for three bills and the budget. We just can’t. However, if you would like to click here, or read this nice summary in the Frederick News Post.  We already reported on the first half of the meeting, and now we will bring you what we know you’ve been sitting on the edge of your seats for: Council Member Comments.

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It really shouldn’t be this dramatic, but alas…

Tony’s got nothing to say so we are off to Kirby, and oh dear Sappho. According to Kirby taxes have gone up 10%, and since he doesn’t know anyone whose income has gone up 10% the money doesn’t match up and everyone should move out of Frederick County. Because 10% of one number is always equal to 10% of another number, right?

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Then there was a long winded diatribe, after he shuffled through his papers for awhile, about how he was lied to about payment to a lobbyist. He even referred to our pal Katherine Heerbrandt’s blog. And we encourage you to read the post he was referring to here. Instead of going through Kirby’s rant about how he was lied to and told things were none of his business, you  be the judge of what really happened. All told, we really don’t think Kirby has a very good understanding of the charter and the powers allotted to the different branches of county government. We know, durh.

Jerry informs us that every member of the council was sent an email to make an appointment with the County Executive to discuss budget priorities. Shall we take wagers on who didn’t make an appointment, or is that too easy?

Billy, oh dear Mother Earth, Billy.  He enlightens us to the fact that budget time is really interesting because taxes never go down. (Is that the only reason, pal?) He then asks some really deep rhetorical questions:

“Where does it stop?”

“Where does it end?”

“Where does it end?”

“In Frederick County it looks like it never ends.”

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Frederick County is in grave danger so it seems.

Jessica also reiterates the fact that on January 24th all council members received an email from the County Executive asking for a meeting regarding the budget. She also tells us about some very interesting things she learned on a tour of Ft. Detrick. We like science and knowledge and stuff so all of this was very fun to listen to.

M.C. is the gold star winner of the council member comments!

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We may even commission her a trophy!

M.C. finds it concerning, as do we, that after two years of going through the budget process that is explicitly put forth in the charter, there are still questions about how it works! While she appreciates the effort in coming up with an alternative budget (we don’t!), according to the charter the council can’t do anything with it!! So, she encourages her fellow council members to put their efforts into making amendments to the CE’s budget AS IT IS SPELLED OUT IN THE CHARTER! She also reminds some of her fellow public servants that the charter states that when money is moved from one category to another it must come before the council. The County Executive, per the charter, is allowed to issue checks up to $20,000 without council approval. She then encourages Shrelauter her fellow council members, that if they don’t like these parts of the charter, then they should put some amendments forth next Spring. Until then, thems the rules! Stop wasting everyone’s precious time!

Next week there are a series of hearings and workshops on the budget. Stay tuned!

Who wants to be our County Executive? Kathy Afzali edition!

fclocalyokel2 Comments
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Mr. Hopkins is doing it better than you!

We’ve already alerted you to the fact that #kirbydelauter has a fancy new website up and running to collect all your money for his County Executive bid. Word is that former contender for that office, Blaine Young, is jumping aboard as his campaign manager. And BAWHAAHA! Please let that be true! Today we have some insight into our other rumored Republican contender for that office, Delegate Kathy Afzali.

In one of our fave FNP sections, Political Notes, we are made aware of how Delegate Afzali is conducting herself while representing our fine area in Annapolis. Turns out, not so good! You see, Delegate Afzali refuses to participate in the General Assembly’s women caucus. And wait until you see the REASONS:

“Afzali said she chooses not to take part in the caucus for several reasons. One, she said, is that so-called women’s issues generally apply to the population at large. She also feels that most of the discussion in caucus meetings would likely focus on liberal topics.”

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Best go back into hibernation Mr. Fluffs!

Do we seriously have a delegate who believes that women’s issues do not exist? Is sexism over in Ms. Afzali’s imaginary utopia?  If that part isn’t astounding enough, let’s pay attention to the second part of her reasoning. It appears the Delegate cannot bear to be in the same room with those who do not subscribe to her point of view. We can imagine it can be quite taxing to share the same air with those who, through the thorough study of history, realize that women’s issues are not at all the same as those that men face.  And let us also call attention to her use of the word likely, as it appears she doesn’t even know what is going on in these meetings that she has taken such strides to avoid!

What makes this even sweeter for us to write about is that many Republican women statewide do NOT share Afzali’s point of view. In fact the article reported to us:

“Rey, a Republican who frequently takes part in floor debates in the House, said she enjoys the caucus meetings as a time to speak candidly with other lawmakers.”

“I think it’s a good place to really discuss the issues and it’s an opportunity to understand different points of view,” Rey said.”

WOW!! Can we trade Kathy for this gal?! If you want a chance at being our County Executive you better shape up lady! We ladies know that while we have made great strides in this country, there is still work to be done. And, if you do happen to be elected county executive, you sure as hell better get used to hearing opposing viewpoints. Because right now, you are doing it all WRONG!

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Your oscillating Yokel round-up!

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Happy Friday y’all!!! Lots of good stuff to point out to you today, so let’s get started!

Adam Umak, proprietor of Frederick County Fact Check, had an excellent LTE in the paper this morning. Make sure you take a look at it. We cannot let Senator Hough and Delegate Afzali get away with this thinly veiled attack on our County  Executive!

Speaking of our CE,  in today’s Political Notes we were made aware of a Town Hall meeting next week. So, if you’ve got anything to say, get your behind over to Winchester Hall at 7 p.m. this upcoming Thursday.

Now for your end of the week comic relief. Kirby weighs in on the dueling ethics bills presented to the Maryland General Assembly this week:

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You can’t wordsmith Kirby! 

Let this quote sink in folks:

“Never notified any land owners and then claims she knew nothing of the plan after the excrement hit the oscillating wind chime.”

That is our new favorite Kirby quote! Man oh man, you can’t make this stuff up! Have a great weekend!

The mystery is solved!!!!

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Council member comments are now up and running as a part of the February 7th meeting. We’ve been speculating wildly as to what the hell Billy did to cause the county AV department to have to go into full editing mode. The mystery has been solved:

Billy claims that we have a rogue inspector roaming through the county randomly inspecting businesses! And this very naughty inspector is costing these businesses, which have been cited for violations, tens of thousands of dollars!!! Billy says that this individual, that he NAMES out LOUD, is “out of control!” He needs to be stopped! Billy is called out by both Bud and the county attorney for disparaging a county employee by name in a public forum, to which Billy screams, “Strike that from the record.” We know someone we would like to strike from our county government.

Billy is also very agitated that while he was out globe trotting, the council would not allow him to conference call in concerning the MTC. To him it is “sad that we have a government that operates this way.” One cannot help but wonder if this call was to take place while he was soaking up the rays with Blaine in Costa Rica. Nevertheless, Billy really hopes that there are some serious repercussions!

Kirby is also worth mentioning if for nothing else, his wild conspiracy theories.

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Everything is terrible!

First off, now Kirby’s not accusing anyone mind you, BUT if county employees are aware of the bargain basement price some of the county machines are being auctioned off at..well ya know they could grab them up and then sell them off for a pretty penny!! Let’s be clear though, he is NOT aware of  ANYONE doing such a thing. But hey, what if? It’s very interesting to him.

Next on the conspiracy ticker, Jan Gardner. Did you people know that for as little as $50 you could get yourself a seat on the Planning Commission?  Everything, and he means EVERYTHING is for sale around here! “Gotta pay to play”! Kirby then starts ticking off some donations that Jan received and guess what? We are looking Kirby’s up as well! If he wants to start the donation listing game we will be more than glad to participate! What set Kirby off on the donation trail? Well, Michael Hough’s last minute ethics bill. You know the one that was submitted on February 1st with a February 3rd turn around date? Not the ethics bill that was properly vetted by the public, just something Hough scratched down last minute. If you are asking how Kirby found out that Jan was so unethical, you need look no further than our frenemy Red Maryland. That’s right a blog just like our own!(Come on Kirby, where’s the love? Don’t we get a mention?) Too bad that we couldn’t see Billy’s face when Kirby brought them up because man oh man they don’t like the Shreve!

As usual, the other council members had positive things to report, along with the unenviable job of telling us why everything that came out of Shrelauter’s collective jaw is so very wrong indeed. And for that, we thank them!

 

Love is in the air…or are we just drunk? Your February 7th drinking game!

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It’s been a few weeks since we’ve had a council meeting, but now we are back and raring to go! Hopefully Kirby will bring his tear-shaped flow chart for us to behold. This week we are doing a drinking game bingo. We noticed that our favorite FNP poet, Armillary, requested that we do so.  So in honor of all his clever limericks, grab your agenda, pick your poison and be responsible!

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2016: Do not pass Go! Do not collect $200! Go Directly to Jail!

fclocalyokel2 Comments

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Your Lady Yokels are holding our collective breath that we can get through these final two days of 2016 without any more tragedy. If you need a distraction to get you through the next couple of days be sure to read our end of year posts. First up we have our Most Popular Posts of 2016. You can revisit your favorite Yokel posts about all that went on in this tumultuous year. Also, we have the coveted Yokel In/Out List. Check back with us on January 4 when we will restart our coverage of our favorite governmental body.

Our Year in Review – 2016 version

fclocalyokel1 Comment

As we close out 2016, it is a time for list making. We are not talking about a list of resolutions for 2017 (although, we could suggest some resolutions for a few Council Members, another post, perhaps?). We are talking about the Ins and Outs for our own Fred Co.

Year of the Cock, er, Rooster
Year of the Cock, er, Rooster

 

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Deck the Halls with Hypocrisy! Fa La La La La La La La La!

fclocalyokel1 Comment

Howdy Yokels! On this last meeting of the year things were going pretty smoothly. Agenda passed 6-1. Budget transfers 6, with one abstain. Approval to change the name from MedImmune to AstraZeneca, that’s right just a name change, was voted for by all except Billy. We don’t even know how to comment on an action so dumb. There was also a nice presentation on the audit that showed us that our government is doing a great job! You can read more about it here.

Then we get to council member comments. And guess who is going to muck it all up?

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Sigh.

What’s got Kirby all hot and bothered? An LTE that ran in the paper this morning that’s what!!!! First of all, FOR SHAME, Frederick News Post for running such a biased Letter to the Editor! This, according to Billy, is why the public no longer has faith in the liberal media. We’ve tried before to explain to Shrelauter what the opinion section of the paper is for and how it’s different from other reporting. However, our patience is about all tapped out, so we’ll just leave it here and hope “someone” learns “something”:

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Kirby thinks that it is very “unfortunate” that the letter writer decided to resort to name calling when it is simply a difference of opinion. Kirby then goes on for 10 minutes about this LTE and how very wrong it is. Even though no deer are mentioned in said letter, Kirby tells us they are doing fine because he sees dead ones scattered along Route 15. And there’s no science people, none! And don’t you know that the farmers are all so scared to speak out about this because they fear the wrath of the one called Jan! It’s true! Stop smirking!! And we can’t help but to see the thin skin similiarities between him and the President Elect. All that’s left for Kirby to do is to open @RealKirbyDelauter on Twitter to treat us to his daily outbursts.

The “unfortunate” comment about name calling was something Ye Olde Lady Yokels could not get beyond. You see, dear readers, we three have been paying attention to what goes around these here parts for quite sometime. Our memories are long and detailed. When Kirby said this we couldn’t help but remember all the times he has resorted to name calling. But, most specifically, how he did it in the very LTE section of the paper that he now laments!

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Hypocrisy on parade that’s what!

Way back in 2014, Kirby had this to say about a middle school teacher who testified before the last BOCC:

“One speaker — Thurmont Middle School language arts teacher Adam Umak — earned my attention with his arrogance, self-serving and inaccurate “testimony,” and borderline circus act. He ended his theatrics by motioning to the BoCC with his hands and announcing “come on,” as if he was asking for a confrontation.”

And he had some nice adjectives to describe former FCTA President Gary Brennan:

“The FCTA (union) is led by the professional whiner and tax revenue gobbler Gary Brennan, who will stop at nothing to bankrupt the taxpaying citizens of Frederick County, even if that means riling up teachers to put on a show or dragging an 8-year-old child to the podium to recite the teachers-need-more-money mantra. It is disgusting for the FCTA to use children like that, but it’s become an annual tradition.”

There’s much more to be seen so please read it here. How “unfortunate” it is indeed when one cannot make their point without name calling.

Billy has some dead horse beating to do about Aurora and sorry we don’t have the energy to transcribe it.

All the other council members had nice comments wishing us all good tidings for the the New Year! We enjoyed hearing about all the meetings that Jessica, Bud and MC attended. It’s so nice how they are engaged in what’s happening around our fair county. So to those who ended tonight on a positive note: Happy Holidays and a Wonderful New Year!