Let’s bring back the dunce hats! Your June 21 council meeting part one.

    These two are much cuter than the two who should be wearing them. These two are much cuter than the two who should be wearing them.

Pre-meeting public comment has no takers…again. Billy starts right in on the agenda. Moves to remove the item concerning appointments to the ethics board. M.C. initiates a discussion with County Attorney Chomel asking if they remove the item would be they be able to discuss it later on. The answer is no, once an item is removed you can no longer talk about it.  Billy then suggests to remove it and then to put it back on the agenda later for discussion. Chomel says, and I quote, that it would be “cumbersome  and futile” to remove an item just to put it right back on again. And, oh, how we laughed, and laughed because cumbersome and futile is the perfect description of Billy’s style of governing.

We fear that Billy is also confused about when he should say no and when he should abstain. He gave a hearty no to the agenda, but an abstain to the consent agenda and then a yes to the meeting minutes, which is a departure from his usual fashion. It’s hard to keep things straight when when you don’t have a real consistent philosophy.

Some very nice representatives from FCC came before the council to discuss the budget of their fine school. We learned that there will be a small increase in tuition and no increase in student fees.There seems to be some loss in the dining services department and this is where the talk gets a little dicey. Kirby and Billy want to know why outside companies are not being considered. Well, the nice lady tells the  story of how they looked into outsourcing the child care center and found that it was not feasible. And holy moly, I guess not everyone is on the privatization train. She even goes on to say she does not want to privatize the custodial or dining services because she would like those people to keep their jobs. Hurray! The only one to vote against the budget in the end was Billy.

Billy is the sole abstainer on the two appointees to the appeals board and then we are on to the real drama of the evening…ethics.

Let’s start off in praise of the four women  who sat before the council this evening. They kept their cool under some really trying circumstances. We have seen a few of these ladies speak in their roles as representatives of the League of Women voters. Every single time they have been articulate and well just awesome. Tonight was no different.

The discussion centered around the pilot program to chose people to sit on the ethics board. It was determined that in order to sit on the board, you would have to prove yourself to be non-partisan. There are a few criteria to prove this: You cannot have held public office in the last four years, served on a central committee for the last 10, have aspirations to run for office or have been involved in a political campaign. They would also like representatives from the two local universities, the United Way, the rotary club and the Unitarian church. The Unitarian church was chosen since it encompasses a variety of faiths. The potential members would only be interviewed by the nominating committee,  not the County Executive or the County Council, with final approval from the Executive. If you remember the beginning of our post we spoke of Billy trying to remove this agenda item. It was because he thinks the council should interview the members of the board. The ladies vehemently disagree with him as do the other members of the council. It shouldn’t be difficult to grasp the concept as to why an ethics board should not come before the council. Shouldn’t be being the two key words.

But of course we all know who is going to throw the biggest fit.

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We’ve written before of Kirby’s Pavlovian response to hearing the word ethics, and tonight was NO different. Our esteemed council member has a suggestion as to a new question that should be asked of our potential ethics board members. Are you ready?

“If your decision is overturned by Executive Order, how will you react?”

BAM! Take that Jan! But seriously people, how long is this going to go on?

Kirby continues by saying the reason you don’t have people lining up to be on the ethics board is because they are afraid that every decision they make will be overturned by Queen Jan. One of the patient nice ladies disagrees completely with this theory to which Kirby tells  her you can disagree but thems the facts. Jerry ventures out into the choppy waters to get clarification as to when the County Executive can issue Executive Orders. This causes our dear county contract-less council member to then scream: All the time! But no the answer is she can only make an order when the issue comes under the Executive’s power. Like county contracts. Kirby tries to say what she did was illegal, gets shut down again, but hey why let the facts get in the way? We keep forgetting he’s the only one in possession of the real facts.

Billy tries to disparage our fine ladies. Proclaims that two of them were involved in a lawsuit against the county. So how can they be non-partisan? And we do not know how these ladies keep their cool, but the one he seems to be addressing asks him directly to what he is referring to. Oh you know, proclaims Shreve. Well, no, no, no. The fine lady tells him that she was never a part of a lawsuit but a representative of a position for the League of Women Voters. And she wasn’t even a part of the ethics nominating committee so the big gotcha moment that Shreve thought he had totally blew up in his face. You know what Billy, citizens can have a position on a piece of county legislation with out it being a partisan affair. You know what else is a popular non-partisan affair in these here parts? Lamenting the legislating style of one Billy Shreve. The new members are appointed 6-1.

The final observation of the evening comes during County Executive appointments. Billy doesn’t like the fact that one of the committees, concerning loans, does not have an expiration date. He tries to put forth a motion, that M.C. tries to parse for him. It’s here that Jessica interjects telling M.C. that she shouldn’t have to make Billy’s motion for him. He is instructed to write his motion down and his reply? He doesn’t need to write it down two other people are doing it already.

We do as well Snuggles.
We do as well Snuggles.

 

 

Are our council members listening? Your June 7th drinking game!

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Leroy! You took the game too far! Don’t be like Leroy, people!

Seriously folks, if the Lady Yokels find you peeking out of trashcans we may have to put a moratorium on these games! It’s been a few weeks since we’ve had one, so take care if you think your tolerance may be low. Let’s begin this game with a hearty congratulations to Jessica and her husband on the birth of their son. Between us Lady Yokels there are 8 Junior Yokels running around. So welcome to the club Councilwoman Fitzwater!

Grab your agenda and follow along, there’s lots of items tonight and lots of times that the folks on the dais need to utilize their listening skills. Hopefully they are all paying attention and NOT staring at the phones for advice.

Public comment is back on the top of the agenda. 15 minutes max at 3 minutes each, means 5 folks max. If any of these 5 folks decide this is a good time to call our esteemed Council President a turncoat, slam back a Benedict Arnold with a smile upon your face.

It's certainly tragic when things don't work out the way you thought they would.
It’s certainly tragic when things don’t work out the way you thought they would.

Nine, that’s right nine, budget transfers are up next! We are probably pretty good until we get to the  bottom two concerning school construction. When the objections come, mix up some Harvey Wallbanger, since we are all so close to banging our heads on the wall.

It’s listening time now. An update will be made by the Maryland Association of Counties. Hopefully Billy and Kirby haven’t partaken of any Fireball shots beforehand and are now engaging in some drunk texting that would cause some kind of embarrassing political resignation. (Who are we kidding, drink away fellas!) In their honor, have a Fireball shot every time they seem to be distracted by their electronic lifeline.

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Time to approve the County Executive’s appointment to the Maryland Fire Service Professional Qualifications Board. If this is met with any static, mix up a Flaming Asshole. Yes, we said it!

It’s time to either approve or reject the historic designation for Glenellen Farm in Ijamsville. When Billy or Turncoat Kirby object to this on account of the brain-washers not getting their “drug treatment” facility, go ahead and have yourself a UFO and good luck driving those nasty Thetans out of your body!

Yippee!
Yippee!

Next up is a renewal for a contract for an external audit. We hear some talk here and there about accountability and outside opinions, so if any nonsense shall occur, sip on your Billionaire cocktail. Since that’s what all these county employees are anyway, right?

Listening time again! A presentation from the department of Solid Waste management and an overview of Agricultural Preservation Programs. We’ll keep the drink the same. If anyone is staring at their electronic delight instead of the informative presentation have yourself a Fireball shot!

Lastly, it’s a presentation of amendments to the Charter from both the County Executive and Council. It’s a long list so we will refer you back to the agenda if you want to see it for yourself. Since that’s probably enough drinking for tonight, get yourself a nice cold drink of that EPA regulated water and re-hydrate.

We’ll update you on the meeting as soon as we humanly can!

 

 

Did you ever hear the one about the two guys who walked into a workshop?

Oh midnight, you may never come out then.
Oh midnight, you may never come out then.

There’s a workshop this evening and we are a little afraid to watch. There’s been so much animosity this week in Frederick politics we aren’t sure how this is going to play out. (Can we say we feel really bad for M.C, Jessica , Jerry and, to some extent, Tony.) Only two items on the docket: Adopting the amendments to council procedures and a discussion of solar utility projects. We’ll let you know what happens but y’all may owe us a drink or two or three….

A Tale of Two Counties…Your May 17th meeting rundown.

We’ve finally figured it out readers! We are living in an alternative reality than Shrelauter and, on occasion, Tony. It’s the only way this all makes any sense.

First let’s thank Baby Fitzwater for allowing his/her mommy to be in attendance during this very important meeting. Without her there…shiver…we don’t even want to think what would have happened.

Tony starts off the meeting trying to get the 6th item pulled off the agenda and wants to have clarification over what is a budget transfer and what is a supplemental appropriation.

On a side note-Kirby is saying yes instead of aye now. He used to say aye, but now he’s adopted Billy’s idiotic manner of using yes. Isn’t he such a brave rebel?

After Billy predictably votes against approving past meeting minutes, we are off on a discussion on bond offerings. There will be two bond series, A and B. A will pay for government projects such as schools, roads and other improvements. B is a refinance on  the note that was taken out three years ago to pay for Montevue/Citizens nursing home. And hey, we think we’ve found Billy’s Pavlovian response. Because holy hell, he won’t let it go. He has to be told by two separate people that this is to simply refinance a note that needs to be paid off, but he wants to know everything about the nursing homes right this very second. Tony gets confused about debt financing debt, which is not what this is. And it’s never easy for our county employees is it?

Now, brace yourself because it’s time to vote on the budget and capital improvement projects. Tony is right out of the gate with his: I’m very sorry but I cannot vote on this budget. Next it’s time for Kirby.

To say the least!
To say the least!

Well Yokels, we knew we wouldn’t get out of this one unscathed. It is ridiculous  to Kirby that the council only cut out $210,000 from this budget. It should have been more! And did you know the county council members are just cookie cutters to the County Executive’s budget (drink!)? Of course, and let’s not forget that Kirby believes they are giving the impression that they are handling this with the savoir-faire of drunken sailors, as well.

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You didn’t think he was going to let this time go without pointing out that Jessica and Jerry vote on their salaries did you?

Jerry is the star of this evening.

It's so very hard, we feel for you Mr. Donald.
It’s so very hard, we feel for you Mr. Donald.

Jerry sees this as a teachable moment. Too bad his students are Billy and Kirby. He reminds them if they actually met with department heads and sat down with the County Executive then maybe, just maybe, they would have seen more of what they wanted in the budget. After all, the time for negotiation is before the budget is written. Jerry pointed out that Kirby wanted to pull $1 million from the education budget.* To which Kirby sarcastically replies, “The children will suffer.”  He then points out that the former BOCC actually raised taxes which elicits a bait and switch comment from Kirby. Jerry then has to point out that Kirby does not know what bait and switch means (kinda like Billy doesn’t understand what a wedding crasher is). There are some more words exchanged which made your Yokel ladies wonder if there will be a fist fight later on.

Jessica adds that she will not cut the budget just for the sake of cutting. The community and department heads said they wanted to see these things in the budget, and that is what is happening. You hear that Shrelauter?! Pay better attention next year! You don’t get to pretend you did something just because you attempt to cut a million things out of the budget after the fact! Bud ends this portion of the meeting with: “We’ve had a good discussion, well we’ve had a discussion. Let’s vote”  Passes 4-3.

Tax rate stays at $1.06. All except two appointments pass with 7-0, Shreve being the only hold out on two. He probably blocked them on Twitter like he did to us as well. Animal control bequest goes off without a hitch and then we have our historical designation hearing on Glenellen Farm. We had a very nice presentation about the history of this property and Lady Thompson’s school that once existed there. This will be voted on at the next meeting. Public comment is one guy that Kirby gave a sheet to read from and then it’s time for council member comments.

Shade Trees and Evergreens is the popular theme this evening.

Kirby starts off the talk with how the county has ruined these poor people’s lives. But hey he’s also not saying that people should go out and do whatever they want. Then again if they’ve gotten away with it for 10 years, then it’s fine. Since they weren’t caught, it gives them immunity, right? But even though they were in the wrong the county shouldn’t bring the hammer down on  them. The county is a train wreck. A train wreck he says! Making businesses follow the rules is running them out of the county.

Billy is so very sorry about the tax increase, folks! And the county is targeting the wedding venues. That’s right! Targeting them. Since the fire marshal has not produced any papers for Billy, Jan is a liar. And we just have to wait for the rest of this to come out!
Tony also insinuates that Jan is lying about the fire marshal. His solution? Let the venue operate until the end of the year, don’t let them use the bathrooms, and then close them down and fine the Dickens out of them!
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M.C. is the first voice of reason on this subject. She wants to know if her fellow council members are really advocating for businesses to not follow the proper procedures. After all, this particular business had been warned and did nothing to correct the situation. And she is getting calls from legitimate businesses who are upset that the three amigos are advocating for a business that is run by people who thought they were above the law. She hopes that there aren’t two separate set of laws in this county.
Bud finishes off this discussion by informing us that he saw some evidence that they haven’t even had their gas lines inspected. So we are talking about a possible explosion here folks.
Hindsight is always 20/20.
Hindsight is always 20/20.

Bud says it doesn’t matter if nothing has happened in the past, that doesn’t excuse them. And if anything were to happen in the future shame on them all! Why can’t they see this? What is the matter with these three? Leave your diagnosis in the comments!

Frederick County politics strikes again.

* This is a correction. The county council did not take $1 million from the education budget as was previously noted. Jerry was pointing out to Kirby that his budget took $1 million dollars away from the schools. Your lady Yokels apologize for any confusion.

Robert’s Rules of Pavlov…an exploration of a county workshop.

It's really something when that happens.
It’s really something when that happens.

We must start this post off with a hearty thanks to our Fire and Rescue volunteers and employees. The first part of the workshop was a discussion of proposed amendments to the County Code concerning Fire and Rescue Services. The gentlemen that presented the amendments were very professional and thankfully didn’t have to put up with any nonsense.

Second item on the agenda was amendments to county council procedures. M.C. was up first and she mistakenly uttered the word “ethics,” which was a GIANT mistake. She hasn’t received the memo that would have informed her when you say the word “ethics” this causes a Pavlovian response in Kirby that none of us have figured out how to control!
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Even though M.C’s amendment had nothing in the world to do with Kirby’s county contracts or the new ethics ordinance or really anything to do with him, you just cannot say this word in his presence. If you do prepare for the outrage and hurt feelings and proclamations of: “Well you’ve got to just live with it.” So much nonsense. Jessica tried to explain to Kirby this was a separate conversation about a separate issue, but the damage had already been done. Seems like we are going to have to come up with a good synonym for ethics if we want to avoid a situation like this in the future. This amendment also spurs a whole Robert’s Rules tirade from Billy. He wants to borrow M.C.’s copy!!!! The Chief of Staff informs Billy that there are copies of the book in the Council’s bookshelf. And Bahaha!! Do you really expect Billy to know where that is? First off, Billy wants to know what version of Robert’s Rules we are following and if he read his own council procedures (which is only 15 pages man!) he would have seen this:

Durh!
Durh!

Then attorney Chomel reads off the definition of misconduct at meetings and it’s as though they have watched Billy in action! Seriously though, let’s help Billy out. Here’s an amazon link to the latest version of Robert’s Rules: http://www.amazon.com/Roberts-Rules-Order-Revised-Paperback/dp/030682020X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1462919573&sr=8-1&keywords=Roberts+rules make sure you ship it to:

Councilman Billy Shreve
Winchester Hall
12 East Church Street
Frederick, MD 21701

This way Billy will never be unprepared again! Or even better, you know what might help?

Robert’s Rules for Dummies

Choose whichever one you think is more appropriate!

M.C. also wants an amendment to eliminate the Treasurer position for the council. Her argument is that the Chief of Staff can assume that as part of their duties. Tony has some objections, says that if the Chief of Staff assumes this duty rather than an actual treasurer then we are not being transparent to the public. M.C. accuses him of being disingenuous about this, and hold on there lady…Do you not know that Tony is not accustomed to being questioned by the female human? This sends him into a petulant rage for the next 15 minutes. Refuses to vote on Jessica’s motion, on a totally unrelated topic.

Lastly, Billy’s amendments. The first one is DOA, because he cannot convince enough of the members that they don’t have enough time to speak during the agenda. His second one concerning public comment at the beginning and end passes with a change. The first session of public commenting cannot exceed 15 minutes. (We enjoyed Jerry’s comment about how if a member of the public cannot be articulate in their first 2 minutes it’s unlikely they will find their inner Abe Lincoln in the third.) After all, M.C. points out, we can’t expect county staff to sit around here all evening. Council member comments will stay at the end as will unlimited time for the public to speak. New Business is also allowed to be put on the agenda with the stipulation that no discussion will take place. Billy tried to say this was necessary because of the Great Wedding Venue Debacle of 2016, but he was quickly shut down with the voices of reason. After all, time is needed to gather all the necessary information to make a rational, thoughtful decision. So yes new items can be introduced, but no yapping about them until next time!

Next week is the big budget vote!!! Frederick politics is never boring this time of year!

Hi ho, hi ho, it’s off to the workshop we go!

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Only two items on this evening’s workshop:

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But uh-oh, there’s been some trouble lately with Kirby and the fire department concerning some amendments and criticism of the Fire Marshal’s decision to shut down a local business. So we’ll have to see how this all plays out. The Council Rules of Procedure has been bumped back a few times now. Let’s not forget Billy is trying to make it so he can talk all the time on anything without any restrictions. We’ll let you know how it all pans out. Tis another week in Frederick politics.

The dog and pony show continued…pony stomps dog to death.

Are you proud Kirby and Billy? Are you?
Are you proud Kirby and Billy? Are you?

As you read in our first report on the sick dog and pony show this evening Kirby spent  quite some time coming up with an alternative budget. We rejoin our fine coverage at the hearing to establish the property tax rate. Not a single speaker was on hand to utter a negative word about keeping the rate at $1.06. Some fine points were made in fact, and we are very happy that people actually realize that our government funds some really necessary services for our county. And District 5 why did you saddle us with Kirby when you had an excellent alternative in Mark Long? We want answers! Final vote on the rate will be held on May 17th.

We are so very sorry, dear readers, but we cannot sit through any more of Kirby’s amendments. He tells us that Meals on Wheels is an excellent program on one hand, and with the other he has his scissors out to cut the entire $23,000 county contribution.  We have to move ahead to the Council member comments.

Poor little monkey!
Poor little monkey!

Kirby’s up first and man oh man, hasn’t he talked enough tonight?  You would think all of his dead amendments would be enough to humble him, but NOOO. He wants $150,000 for bus transportation to Mother Seton school. That’s right he wants bus transportation to a private school. He also adds that Jan should be down on her hands and knees thanking the last BOCC. Without their business friendly policies she wouldn’t have all the extra greenbacks to spend. Don’t hold your breath Kirbo! Then he ends with a very contradictory statement about how the nursing home is run pretty good right now but  will still  destroy us all in the end.

It’s Billy’s turn.

Sorry Princess Kitty, it'll be over soon.
Sorry Princess Kitty, it’ll be over soon.

You know something Yokels? As much as we disagree with just about everything that came out of Tony and Kirby’s mouth tonight, at least they did something. Billy had nothing to offer. Besides screaming “second” to Kirby’s amendments he had nothing original to contribute. So why should we expect anything of substance at comment time? One sentence comes out of his mouth: It’s sad we couldn’t get a Republican majority on the board…we supposedly have one. So we guess county council meetings are really just a war for Billy. R’s vs. D’s. How’s that been working out for ya?  He then disappears. That’s right, he walks right out.

Jerry is up. And oh how so refreshing it is to hear a grown up talk. He points out that those members who actually sat down with the County Executive and voiced their concerns, didn’t have to make a million amendments and waste everyone’s time. Imagine that, working together to come up with a budget instead of putting on an embarrassing show. It’s revolutionary!

Jessica points out the BOCC’s budgets always went up and in fact they grew at a faster rate than those proposed by the County Executive. Huh.

Tony doesn’t have a problem raising taxes.(!) He wants us to know, however, that the economy will NEVER be like those of the past.

M.C. thanks the staff and commends them for coming out on their own time to defend their budgets against Kirby’s cuts. And yes, these poor people. To be a fly on the wall during their Happy Hour.

Bud feels bad that Kirby spent so much time and money on his budget. (Please don’t Bud!) He lets Kirby know that he feels you get  further ahead when you sit down and talk to people then when you fight them from afar. Bud speaks of allowing Kirby’s amendments to be presented, to which Kirby starts his back sassing and subsequently storms out. Probably to join Billy at wherever they go to slam back the Fireballs. Bud ignores the petulant man child to finish his remarks with his usual style and grace. President Otis, you can’t reason with that man, it isn’t even worth your breath.

Kirby is allergic to the honey!
Kirby is allergic to the honey!

 

Billy is going to bend the county council procedures to his whims!! Your April 26th county council workshop edition.

Zeus give us strength!
Zeus give us strength!

Continue reading “Billy is going to bend the county council procedures to his whims!! Your April 26th county council workshop edition.”

What a week it’s been!!!

So much has happened this past week in Ye Olde Fredericktowne that your friendly Yokels have decided to do a weekly roundup. Let’s start with the County Council and happy budget fun time.

We’ve written two posts this week about budget talk. Read it here and here. However, we were very interested to find this in the Political Notes section of the paper this morning:

County Executive Jan Gardner’s budget announcement last Friday included a new little nugget. Well, five of them.

Gardner said she extended an invitation to all seven Frederick County Council members to talk about the budget, including a list of their priorities. Five members took her up on the offer: Democrats Jerry Donald, M.C. Keegan-Ayer and Jessica Fitzwater and Republicans Bud Otis and Tony Chmelik.

Gardner said she couldn’t meet all of their requests, but each was considered in her proposal.

Councilmen Billy Shreve and Kirby Delauter, also Republicans, didn’t take Gardner up on the offer, apparently.

It seems they have other plans.

Shreve, who is still upset the council doesn’t have a dedicated budget officer, gave handouts to his colleagues, showing that they are the only council in the state without such help. Nevertheless, Shreve said he was going to dig into the numbers.

“I’m going to work on this budget. Look at it. See if we can make some changes,” he said Tuesday. One major change he pitched included scrapping a plan to keep the county’s property tax rate steady — which will yield increased revenue — and instead lower the rate and cut spending.

“The easiest solution … is if you have the same amount of revenue as you did last year, you adopt the same budget you did last year,” Shreve said.

Kirby and Billy are fine sitting on the couch thank you very much!
Kirby and Billy are fine sitting on the couch thank you very much!

So not only are they refusing the County Executive’s invitation to come discuss the budget, which really is a dereliction of their duty, but Billy is all fine and dandy with keeping everything the same. Why should we strive to improve? A real brain stumper!

Next on our wrap up is Sheriff Jenkins. As we are sure you all know our Sheriff testified in front of Congress this week about illegal immigration. Last night, Sean Hannity had the Sheriff and two other guests on for four minutes of the most exquisite fear mongering we have ever seen.

Is that comment for reals?
Is that comment for reals?

Look, we here at the Yokel do not want anyone, be it citizens, immigrants, or illegal immigrants, committing crimes. And if someone had hurt our kids, we cannot say that we wouldn’t feel the same way that poor woman who testified with the Sheriff does. However, this kind of sensational talk does nothing to bring about meaningful immigration change.  What it does do is incite fear and discrimination against the Latino community. Not one of us wants criminals running around our community. Building a wall is not a realistic solution towards that goal. Also, it is a known truth that huge numbers of “illegals” arrive by plane and overstay an expired, once-valid visa, so wasteful government spending on a stupid wall is stupid and wasteful. But now we totally get why Fox News watchers are so angry and paranoid all the time. Jeeze O’Flip that channel! And we also didn’t realize how scary a place Frederick is to live, the internets must be wrong about us.

 

Who exactly is the beast in this scenario Gaston?
Who exactly is the beast in this scenario, Gaston?

Last on our roundup: You may have heard that a certain Presidential Contender was in town yesterday. Another nugget from the Political Notes section was this:

Apparently, that relationship stuck. Ahead of Cruz’s rally on Thursday, Hough picked Afzali to pick up the candidate from the airport. And if Cruz’s camp was impressed with Folden’s driving skills, they may have had a different review of the Afzali Cab Service. “My husband went slow, because I needed to talk to Ted,” Afzali said. “We had a lot to talk about.”

If Cruz wasn't so terrible we might have felt sorry for him. But since he is, we laughed and laughed.
If Cruz wasn’t so terrible we might have felt sorry for him. But since he is, we laughed and laughed.

If you missed our tweets about his speech head on over to @fclocalyokel and take a looky look. The most disturbing story to come out of that mess was the transgender student who was thrown out of rally. You can read the story here. But James, we would be remiss if we did not officially give you a Yokel tip of the hat:

Thank you for having the courage to stand up for what you believe in. Always be proud of who you are!
Thank you for having the courage to stand up for what you believe in. Always be proud of who you are!

We really don’t get all this fervor over public bathrooms. Whether you like it or not transgender people have been using public bathrooms for years. And has society crumbled as a result? No! Because nothing bad has happened! You really should be more afraid of former Republican Speakers of the House and U.S. Senators. But if you can’t get past it, Kirby has a solution:

Brilliant!
Brilliant!

 

New fun time: Council meeting bingo

We thought we’d mix it up a little this week. Here’s your agenda. In case you do feel compelled to drink at any point, we’ll recommend you toss back an Alien Secretion and encourage Xenu to scamper on outta here.

 

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Click on image to open in a separate tab for printing!