Frederick County Council – Page 25 – frederick local yokel

Frederick County is a mysterious place this week!

February 18, 2016 fclocalyokelLeave a comment

I bet we can solve this in 30 minutes or less!

Quite the intrigue here in Frederick this week! First we had Kirby’s declarations of unconstitutionality concerning his sad, lost county contracts. Now, at last night’s joint BOE meeting, we learned that Kirby has a mysterious developer all ready to finance one of the two needed county elementary schools.

Why the mystery you may be asking? Well, just shut up!!! Kirby has his reasons!!! He won’t tell us, but why should he? It couldn’t be because there are some pretty outlandish conditions associated with this, could it?

What we learned from watching, and today’s FNP article, is that this all has the smell of back door school privatization. Not only would this school be leased back to the county, which has been been a bad deal throughout the land…Well, just look:

Cost savings may also come from custodial and maintenance operations being handled by the private sector, the councilmen said.

So here we go again! Remember all this privatization crap when Blaine came into office? Now, Tony and Kirby invite it to rear it’s ugly head once again. Here’s a great quote from an NEA analysis on privatizing school support services:

There is less accountability to the residents of a school district by their elected representatives when vital services are taken over by private contractors. Contractors tend to focus on performing only the tasks contained in their work descriptions, which is understandable because they are hired only to perform specific narrowly defined jobs.

By contrast, school district employees tend to view themselves as a vital part of the system of education, and provide numerous “intangibles” that enhance the quality of their work and the educational experience of children in school.

School district employees routinely perform a range of tasks that are not typically thought of as being in their official job descriptions but that are vitally important in providing a high quality education for children. [i] The great majority of educational support workers live in the school district where they are employed, and they feel responsible to their neighbors for the quality of their work.

Most private contractors base their sales pitch on the premise that they can provide the same or greater service at lower cost

Here’s the full NEA article and a great point sheet about the risks involved in such an endeavor.

Kirby and Tony cannot treat the school system as they do their contracting and excavating businesses. It’s not the same on any level. Our children are not commodities that can be moved around on a spreadsheet. They are unique human beings with a variety of talents and needs. And quite frankly, if we don’t get this part of their lives right and educate them properly, then we as a society will feel the repercussions for years to come. We must not allow the promise of a badly needed school lead us down a path of high costs, poor services and low wages. For this low wage, low cost thinking that has led to the elimination of many middle class jobs in this country.

We do need good discussion and solutions as to how to finance not only these two schools, but schools that will be needed down the road. It will have to be a combination of private and public funds and it must be a priority. It should not be a back door dismantling of our public education system all in the guise of saving money. We cannot let these gentlemen get away with that!

As for who the developer is, we really have no idea. But that is not going to stop us from speculating wildly and naming Roy Stanley. Should we start a pool?

#kirbydelauter-“I didn’t learn nothin’ in school and either will you!”

February 2, 2016February 2, 2016 fclocalyokel1 Comment

We apologize, but really it isn’t our fault. #kirbydelauter has once again taken to the noodley appendage to spread his delusions. Click here to read if you dare or just read our fine synopsis.

We need a lobbyist!!! Kirby informs us that he has a gambling problem and then gives a bunch of numbers showing how economical it would be for the council to hire a lobbyist to get Frederick County more moolah. And we are all so skeptical about this. Because you know who told Kirby that Frederick was missing out on money? That’s right, the lobbying firm. Well that’s some fine unbiased information isn’t it? Do we not have State Delegates for this purpose? Or is it that Kirby cannot demean himself to deal with any Democrats to bring home the State dollars? Hmm.

Now it’s going to get much, much worse. It’s impact fee time. Kirby uses a lot–and we mean a lot–of numbers to try to get his point across. He goes back to some Jan Gardner/Doug Browning conspiracy of yesteryear. # claims that since a past impact fee increase failed to work, it’s no use going down that road again. It’s at this point, dear readers, that we believe that Kirby either suffers from short term memory loss AND/OR believes that the rest of us do. In 2012, the Board of County Commissioners voted to stop the inflationary increase that was set to kick in every July 1st:

In other words, they did not allow the impact fees to work. There was also that time they changed fees. Surely Kirby wants y’all to forget about that as well. GRRR!!! You cannot alter the impact fees and then complain they were a failure!!! It doesn’t work that way!

So how do we fix the school construction problem?

That’s right! We Jiffy Lube the school employees! It’s a true fact that if you don’t have to pay salaries and benefits you can save lots of cash! Look people, from the looks of his article, Kirby didn’t learn anything about sentence structure or any of that other fancy learning. So do your kids really need an education? How’s about we do away with that altogether? Just imagine the savings!

giphy

Jiffy Lube never makes a misteak!

Let’s lay off the hard liquor -Your February 2nd guide to the County Council meeting

February 2, 2016 fclocalyokelLeave a comment

It's Unamerican I tell ya! — It’s Unamerican I tell ya!

For this month’s meeting we are going to lay off the hard liquor and only offer wine and beer options. Make sure you grab your agenda and please remember this game is only for entertainment purposes. We hear that Billy isn’t taking any more calls.

Right out of the gate there is a budget transfer for the Department of Aging. And oh yawn, Billy will say something about Aurora’s hurt feelings and how Jan is going to take everyone’s land away. When he does slam back An Arrogant Bastard.

Next it’s time to sign the Ordinance allowing Ourisman Chevorlet to expand their dealership. There’s already been lots of discussion and a vote. So if any last minute shenanigans rear their ugly heads, have a little sip of some Le Vin De La Merde. ( Billy would be happy to translate for you)

Uh-oh, Union talk. However, when the union applies to the Fire department it’s not met with the same vitriol as let’s say…the teacher’s union. All this bill wants to do is lengthen the amount of time the union has to bargain. If any, and we mean any, anti-union talk makes it in to this discussion, go ahead and have yourself a Blind Pig. Since you would have to be one to not see all the benefits of an organized work force.

What’s this? Emperor Jan wants her minion Bud to be able to approve budget transfers under these very specific conditions:

1-8-31. COUNCIL PRESIDENT APPROVAL OF CERTAIN TRANSFERS OF UNENCUMBERED APPROPRIATIONS.

(A) The County Council authorizes the President of the County Council to approve, on behalf of the County Council, a transfer of an unencumbered appropriation that:

(l) The County Executive has recommended;

Is between departments, agencies and offices•
Is within the same fund in the Operating Budget: and
Transfers $10,000 or less.

If the County Council President, in the President’s sole discretion, does not approve the transfer of the unencumbered appropriation, the County Council may consider and approve the transfer.

Venus have mercy on our souls!!!! We just know there is going to be quite a bit of lively discussion about how Bud is just a rubber stamp to the capricious whims of Bloody Jan. So when this all too predictable mess begins get your six pack of Red Emperor.

As if all of the above wasn’t enough, we are back to ethics. One would hope, that by now, Kirby would come to some kind of peace with this. That he will stop turning bright red and stammering on about the teacher’s conflict of interest and just generally looking like a crazy person. So WHEN this happens pass around a bottle of Pure Arrogance.

Whew! This week is rough! Now on for special exceptions for historical structures. Here comes the Trout Run talk out of Billy! Time to beer bong the Cult of the Occult!

Now it’s time for Public Comment and those troublesome (at least for some) council member comments. This has been a busy evening so save yourself the hangover and have some water while you listen to the informative ramblings.

Billy explains his abstentions-still makes no sense.

January 25, 2016January 25, 2016 fclocalyokelLeave a comment

What must be going through Councilman Shreve’s brain when he sits at his computer to pen his excuses for the Woodsboro times? Does he really expect anyone to relate to this stream of consciousness b.s. ? I mean really folks, does he really think we are this dumb? Let us start with excuso numero uno:

December, 12 months in office. #1 duty of the County Council is to provide budget oversight. So far, after 12 months, we still have not hired a Budget Director. I have protested this repeatedly by abstaining on all budget related votes, over 60 times this year. (I refuse to do hunger strikes : )

Ha ha! As if Billy’s not going to eat for you jerks!!! So, why did he vote “yes” for Trout Run? And why vote against the minutes? Because it’s all a very convenient bunch of crap. Billy must have been hungry when he wrote this because there’s this:

I’m not a big government guy and don’t propose hiring employees just to have them, but if you are running a restaurant, you need a cook, dishwasher, and server. The Council inherited a $550 million dollar budget and a population of 240,000. An entity this size requires staff to handle the day to day operations on day one! We aren’t running a coffee shop; we need employees.

But you just said a coffee house/restaurants need employees. Wouldn’t the better analogy be: like a coffee shop, we need an adequate number of employees to make sure things run smoothly. OHH OHH! 25 word job-posting digression time:

Billy’s Speech Writer

Must be able to take endless non sequiturs and unrelated analogies and translate them into standard English. Overtime a must!

Any hoo! Back to the article. There’s lots and lots of complaining about Mike Gastley, and how they had to put all the numbers into Kirby’s work budget software (what the what). And they still, even though they were on the BOCC for four years, weren’t able to make heads of tails of it all. What we find most interesting about this whole written catastrophe is what Billy leaves out. He omits the name of the very person that Billy and Kirby put forth. A person who not only vacations with one Councilmember, and tailgates with another, but one who is living with the very person who lost to Jan! Look at his complaint about Mr. Gastley:

How can we believe he will support the Council and not the County Executive? Is this the right person to provide checks and balances to the County Executive? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Now, can we believe that this person that Billy and Kirby put forth will provide the the appropriate support to ALL of the members of the county council? That this person would also, without bias, take information from the County Executive’s office and relay that to the council? I think we can be safe to say: NOOOOOOOOO! Maybe–just maybe–Billy would have just a shred of credibility if he had not put this name forward. But hey, since when has Billy ever worried about that?

Xenu part deux: Narconon clusternut at Trout Run

January 15, 2016 fclocalyokel2 Comments

What the heck is even going on? A judge has remanded another frustrating thing back to the Frederick County Council, saying that they did not explain the reason for their vote that kept Trout Run from receiving a historic designation. (Umm…they said it wasn’t a special piece of local history?) Nobody apparently told Judge William R. Nicklas, Jr. about the shall versus may voodoo. Maybe the people who have since trotted that line out with regard to other issues should use the argument more conservatively.

If only it were this easy to erase, start over, forget these cretins.

What all this means is…Well, we don’t know for sure.

The Underground Bunker has expressed the matter concisely.

Judge William R. Nicklas Jr held a hearing earlier this month, and then this week came out with a ruling that seems to have confused nearly everyone. Researcher Mary McConnell declared that it was good for the county council, the local NBC station announced that it was a clear win for Scientology, and even more expert local observers don’t really explain whether this is good for one side or the other.

But maybe we will get Billy Shreve on Kojo Nnamdi’s show again, feverishly defending the need to have these exploitative, abusive whackadoodles run a campground for drug addicts to spend all day reading Dianetics and dehydrating in a sauna up in the northern reaches of Frederick County. What in the great and bizarre-o Milky Way Galaxy is driving his advocacy of this deadly nonsense?

Your Pre-Thanksgiving drinking game- will Kirby and Billy just watch us burn?

November 17, 2015 fclocalyokelLeave a comment

Let's hope things don't get this bad folks! — Let’s hope things don’t get this bad, folks!

Howdy-do, faithful readers! It’s that drinking time of the month again. Not too much on this agenda but we are all too sure a few will find a way to make things interesting on a legislative day. There’s no reason this can’t be lively.

Last month it was boys in ties, this month it’s the Girl Scouts. If you see a scowl from any of the usual suspects when picture time comes, simply sip a Thin Mint Martini.

If (when?) Billy abstains, at each occurrence take a gulp of your Abstinence on the Beach.

Assuming snide comments will be made by someone or other–especially in light of the fact that things have been taken off the agenda and there’s a request to go to a closed session–if a complaint is expressed in those oh-so-indignant tones brewed to perfection over time, have a swig of anything from the Whiners craft beer menu.

Your October 20 drinking game: Libraries, Agriculture and Marijuana oh my!

October 20, 2015 fclocalyokelLeave a comment

And that's not how you read! — And that’s certainly not how you read!

If you had to drink copious amounts of wine to get over this past weekend’s Letters to Editor extravaganza, you may just want to observe this week’s game. What LTE’s ? Well, Blaine’s of course, but that’s par for the course. The one that had us all in a tizzy was the “letter” that waxed nostalgic about the good old days when people formed posses and kicked everyone’s butts. You know, the days of milk and honey when your friendly gun did no harm and certainly way before that devil Obama taught all our sissy children to run and hide from gunfire instead of charging the gun man head on. Man those were the days!

Sorry Snickers! We will try to be better!

If you were blissfully ignorant of all that apologies, apologies! We’ll get on to the game. Grab your agenda, DO NOT call Billy (unless you have something funny to say) and remember this is all in good fun. Click here to watch it live.

Consent agenda looks really interesting. Lots of Billy’s pet causes: Library, Family Partnership, Parks and Rec, Housing and Community Development. Will this all pass without a hitch? Of course not. If Billy tells us to go the now defunct Borders to buy a book or in any way decides to criticize the purchase list of the library slam back a Ernest Hemingway Special.

Next up we have the first reading of an amendment to appeal the Agricultural Rights Transfer Ordinance. If there is any complaining, even a sigh, about overturning another Blaine deal drink some Bitch Juice!

Time for Public Comments! For everyone that decides to complain about the county taking back the nursing home, take a sip of your Zombie, since that’s what that kind of talk makes us feel like.

Whoop Whoop! Council member comments! We hear that Fireballs are popular with some of the members. Therefore, if anything untoward should happen, slam back the Fireball shots at will!

Last item is a hearing about the growth of Medical Cannabis here in Frederick county. So far we seem to be aligned with Billy on this issue. (Not sure if our motives are the same, but hey, we’ll take what we can get!) Also, not sure how the other members feel (looking at you Tony), so if there’s any dissent on giving sick people the relief they need, have a shot of some cannabis vodka.

Hey Carroll County, wanna make a deal?

October 17, 2015 fclocalyokelLeave a comment

Hey Carroll County neighbors! How ya doing on this crisp Fall morning? Many of us over here in Frederick have a proposition for you. How about a little land deal, specifically the section of Union Bridge that FORMER BOCC President Blaine Young now occupies? Please take this proposal under serious consideration, we’ll let it go for pennies.

We have spoken of the previous bitterness that Blaine exhibits when Jan fixes his monumental mistakes. And with all earnestness, we here at the Yokel hoped he would find new purpose in his lawn care business and would leave us all the hell alone. Alas,one look at this morning’s Letters to the Editors shows just how naive we were. The only consolation we receive is the comment section which is on full blown anti-Blaine alert . We are not even going to pick apart the letter since it’s a bunch of nonsense that doesn’t deserve the time we would waste. However, we will say that chuckling occurred when he stated that money saved could have been used towards schools and roads. Does he think we are all new here?

Before we sign off, a shout out to Harvey Burnsteel of Thurmont who wrote a great LTE about Mr. Shreve this morning. Here’s our favorite part:

Shreve’s performance to date, further supported by his letters to the editor, is barely above poor. We citizens of Frederick County deserve better representation than this.

Agreed Mr. Burnsteel, we all deserve better.

Dead horse beating meeting (version eleventy bazillion)

October 7, 2015October 7, 2015 fclocalyokelLeave a comment

So last evening’s hot workshop topic was the ethics task force final report, and how that went on and on. And on. And on. It is a complex issue, worthy of serious discussion. Some things on the list:

Increasing the ethics commission size from 5 to 7 members, and limiting them to 2 terms.
Developing a defined process for reconsidering advisory provisions (I would like to put a Lebowski quote here, but it’s got a no-no word)
An astonishingly controversial conflict of interest clause that prohibits elected officials, their spouses, children, parents, or siblings, or business entities that elected officials (or any of these same close relatives) have a financial interest in from doing business with the county
Tightening up financial disclosure for some positions
A clause prohibiting retaliation toward anyone who files an ethics complaint (good idea, maybe!)
Making it possible to subpoena people for ethics violation issues

There’re a bunch of problems, and you can guess who has them (although, surprisingly, Kirby Delauter was nearly silent through the whole thing). Billy Shreve is the B.S. boy, and he was on duty. Probably thought he would have more credibility with Kirby’s Law already on the books. One such problem he has is why the commission is not appointed by an independent body (he’s miffed, because Jan gets to be the deciderer…sort of). Maybe the Bar Association? I hope he said Bar and not Bartenders.

Turns out, it’s in the charter. Who would have thunk it? The charter gives the C.E. power of appointments, with approval by the council. And then Billy’s all, “Why are we bothering if we can’t change anything?” Round and round we go, and luckily Mr. Karl Bickel manages to put it palatably by explaining that everyone is on the same page, and that the charter is the obstacle but the task force doesn’t have the authority to amend it. Billy behaves like a giant snozzcumber, even when he has a good point, like that the definition of financial interest needs to be clear. It’s the tone of voice, man.

We are growing numb to this argument about how nobody can have a livelihood and be an elected official with these onerous prohibitions guarding against the appearance of impropriety. Mr. Craig Hicks kindly points out that it depends upon the industry as to how large a part of the market share is dependent upon the government. I suppose this means if you are a cobbler or run a spa, you may still have a chance to avoid the debtors prison. Oh we don’t have those, anymore? Hm. I better not give anyone ideas this primary season.

Your dear ol Yokel is sick to death of the whining about how you can’t participate in government if you are a poor little bidnessman. We are trying to watch these things and be informed and responsive citizens (and help some of y’all out by sharing the info, too). We are cooking dinner, wrangling homework, and chauffeuring to and from sports fields when meetings take place. It’s not just a Founding Fathers’ world that has changed. Abigail Adams’ modern counterparts have a lot going on, and time is a luxury both men and women have to balance. Every bit as valuable as money. I know a couple of them are probably burned up about it, but nowadays (!!!) we also get to vote and hold office. The way a couple council members have spoken to their female peers when they are agitated speaks volumes.

So, Chmelik. He’s all crabby about making rules that have maybe not even been broken yet and stuff. Linda Norris-Weldt lets him know (and I believe this came up more than once) that they got input from citizens, and amongst people about town the perception is that things used to go on in the dark behind closed doors. Uh….you don’t say?

Toward the conclusion we were treated to some mental gymnastics that on one level sounded perfectly reasonable, concerning whether or not a decision from the ethics commission could be appealed. Sounds sensible, right? And then it just isn’t, because what it is really about is how it can (and that one time has) come to pass that the County Executive issues an executive order when the ethics commission is not sufficiently ethical, and it isn’t actually about appealing a penalty at all. Just griping that they might be expected to be, well, ethical.

Council member comments-Let the cray cray come out to play!

October 7, 2015October 7, 2015 fclocalyokel3 Comments

Usually we mix in the council member comments with our report of the meeting. However, this section of the meeting deserves a separate post. Seriously thinking of doing a PIA to see who is coaching Billy and Kirby on the stuff that comes out of their mouths. Let’s begin with the esteemed Council Member from District 5.

How many more months can this go on for dear citizens? How many more?

Kirby has some really good investigative information about the Rock the Barn event that took place a few weeks back. This event was the pinnacle of unethical tomfoolery seen this side of the Appalachians! When are you people going to open your eyes and see how the union is stealing money from the teachers and then giving it to two other teachers in order to advance their evil plan for world domination? And for $1,000 a plate? Where was this barn located? The Ritz-Carlton? Thankfully, we have Kirby to unravel all the deceit that is taking place right under our noses! He over and over and over again reminds us to “Follow the money!”

Wait, what’s that Council Woman Fitzwater? The teacher’s union isn’t allowed to use member dues to contribute towards political activity? It comes from a voluntary fund, that people actually VOLUNTEER to donate to? I don’t understand. Kirby was all set to unionize his workers and then steal their dues to finance his campaign. How will he get re-elected now? And what about the $1000 a plate? That’s not true either?

Does that mean everything Kirby said was wrong tonight? Everything?

Oh well, let’s move on. Jerry mentions attending a drug graduation program with Chmelik. And then refuses to address anything Kirby said because, you know, dead horse.

Readers, do you really want to know about Billy’s comments? I wish I could take a live poll while I am writing this. But since we aren’t technologically there yet, sigh…

Billy hates liquor inspectors. He’s very upset that now instead of having two part time inspectors we will have one benefited, salaried inspector. Because you know paying people so they can actually live, breathe and eat really sucks! And then there’s some complaining about some mysterious, small restaurant that exists on a giant parcel of land that can’t get its liquor license. And now Billy is going to go into full hyperbolic mode and let’s us all know that this county is doing everything, and he means everything they can to make sure they are unfriendly to business. EVERYTHING!

Tony wants us to know that a blog stated that 7 out of 10 elementary schools are really good in his district. Really good. Does that mean he’ll keep that in mind next year when budget discussions come up? Tony will also have a Town Hall in Mt. Airy at 6:30 on November 2. He has promised that, “Everything is up to debate.”

M.C. reminds us that it’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month. So ladies make sure you get those things checked out!

Bud is participating in this Saturday’s Heartly House event: Are you man enough to walk a mile in her shoes? We know some on the council watch page will probably criticize the way you walk this Saturday Bud, but we support you! Bud also has something to say about a certain Council Member’s accusation that since the new government took hold, permits have been very slow to process. (Bud doesn’t mention who made the complaint, but we have a pretty good guess). Well, Bud asked the agency to do an internal audit to see if there was anything to this. And the result? No significant change. But I am sure that dead horse will come out again soon.

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