We  apologize, but really it isn’t our fault. #kirbydelauter has once again taken to the noodley appendage to spread his delusions. Click here to read if you dare or just read our fine synopsis.

We need a lobbyist!!! Kirby informs us that he has a gambling problem and then gives a bunch of numbers showing how economical it would be for the council to hire a lobbyist to  get Frederick County more moolah. And we are all so skeptical about this. Because you know who told Kirby that Frederick was missing out on money? That’s right, the lobbying firm.  Well that’s some fine unbiased information isn’t it? Do we not have State Delegates for this purpose? Or is it that Kirby cannot demean himself to deal with any Democrats to bring home the State dollars? Hmm.

ygrih

Now it’s going to get much, much worse. It’s impact fee time. Kirby uses a lot–and we mean a lot–of numbers to try to get his point across. He goes back to some Jan Gardner/Doug Browning conspiracy of yesteryear. # claims that since a past impact fee increase failed to work, it’s no use going down that road again. It’s at this point, dear readers, that we believe that Kirby either suffers from short term memory loss AND/OR believes that the rest of us do.  In 2012, the Board of County Commissioners voted to stop the inflationary increase that was set to kick in every July 1st:

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In  other words, they did not allow the impact fees to  work. There was also that time they changed fees.  Surely Kirby wants y’all to forget about that as well. GRRR!!! You cannot alter the impact fees and then complain they were a failure!!! It doesn’t work that way!

So how do we fix the school construction problem?

ygr3x

 

That’s right! We Jiffy Lube the school employees! It’s a true fact that if you don’t have to pay salaries and benefits you can save lots of cash! Look people, from the looks of his article, Kirby didn’t learn anything about sentence structure or any of that other fancy learning. So do your kids really need an education? How’s about we do away with that altogether? Just imagine the savings!

giphy

Jiffy Lube never makes a misteak!