Tag: Frederick County Council

How long can Billy hold out before looking like a jerk? About 20 minutes.

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The meter was off the charts tonight!

We had a short workshop tonight! Not a good one, but a short one!

Jerry starts off nicely talking about how we can deal with blighted properties more effectively. And he wants to talk to the State Board of Education about taking teachers out of the classroom to fulfill other positions. He wants to know if these positions are really necessary when we have overcrowded classrooms.

Kirby opens up with talks of plagiarism. We reported on this very issue last night as did Frederick County Fact check. He got an email from someone accusing him of plagiarizing his list. He gets Regan to talk about how they search for legislation and since it’s a talking point and not legislation it doesn’t matter. Uh, okay.

Then he’s off explaining his legislative ideas. Since we already discussed them last night, we aren’t going to rehash the horror. We do feel the need to say something about his anti-union proposal though. We are going to postulate that perhaps Kirby isn’t aware of the history of labor in our country.  Perhaps he is ignorant of the fact that our benevolent Titans of Industry didn’t give more than a rat’s ass about the workers in their factories.

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That would be the only explanation we will accept as to why he said that since they’ve been doing this in the South they’ve been able to produce much better products. Jerry does take him to task on this, but of course he can’t answer any of his concerns. His stock answer was: “I don’t want to legislate that.” Oh no, he only wants to legislate getting RID of the union. He doesn’t care what the employer does next. We want to help Kirby become better educated. Especially since rumors are bouncing off the mountains that he’s going to run for CE. Therefore, Kirby please go to Amazon and order this book, if it’s too many words, would you at least read the Wikipedia entry on the History of the Labor Movement in the US? Pretty please?

Kirby and Billy had a meeting of the minds and decided that they want to eliminate all VEIP stations. Why, because private industry wants a little bit of that emission cash. Why wait in line at the VEIP station when you can wait for an appointment at your local car mechanic? I wonder if the price will go up? Hmmm.

Jessica wants legislation to help parents find drug treatment for their kids. And why do we only have two nice things to talk about tonight?

New business is last on the agenda. Billy must have missed Jan’s press conference because he’s in a tizzy about the nursing home again. And here’s the part where he acts like a jerk. After using the term “smoke and mirrors” about 5 times…

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…he takes a turn on Bud. He starts shouting at him for not bringing this up on the agenda. Bud says that now the deal is done he will. Billy accuses him of stalling and doing everything the County Executive instructs him to do. He then shouts, “You don’t do anything!” Bud calmly replies that is his opinion and he is certainly entitled to it. To which Billy screams that he can ask a lot of people. Bud ends the meeting and we are very sorry Mr. Otis, that you had to put up with such antics on your birthday! We hope you can at least have a nice birthday dinner.

 

 

 

Let’s all be elitists! Send in your legislative ideas!

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This evening, the county council will embark upon a workshop to consider legislative ideas to send to Annapolis. Don’t forget that you can email either the County Executive or your council member with any ideas you may have.

Some of our representatives shriek loudly about how everything is horrible in our fine county. Will they have any ideas to submit this evening? Late last evening we were lucky enough to receive Kirby’s legislative priorities. Read all about them here. Your Lady Yokels are on the case.

Jeremiah is a little more polite than we are.
Jeremiah is a little more polite than we are.

Some ideas from the past year. ICYMI.

Is our Kirby legislatin’?

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This evening brought into the Yokel inbox a press release from none other than # himself! Stop snickering people, it’s true! He’s got some legislative initiatives he wants to jet on over to Annapolis. We can’t see one of these actually going forward, but at least he put some effort into it, right? Well….

The first item we are going to dissect has to do with concealed weapons. Here’s what Kirbo wants to happen here in Maryland:

Maryland to be a “Shall” Carry State for Concealed Carry Weapons Permit

 

To allow all law-abiding citizens the right to carry a concealed weapon; and to the education of the community to the awareness that ‘shall issue’ laws have, in all cases, resulted in decreased rates of violent crime.  

All cases?!  Politifact rated that statement 1/2 true. Everyone knows that when you want to find out if someone is a plagarizing, you can do a Google search. Since we are a suspicious lot when it comes to Kirby, we did just that. Our investigating led us to a charming page called ammoland.com. His initiative is the same wording of a mission statement from some group called Maryland Shall Issue. So at least we know ole # can cut and paste!

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Of course we need some good old union bashing laws!! Here’s what Kirby has in mind:

Prohibiting an employer from requiring, as a condition of employment or continued employment, an employee or a prospective employee to join or remain a member of a labor organization, pay charges to a labor organization, or pay a specified amount to a third party under specified circumstances; prohibiting an employer from threatening an employee or a prospective employee with specified action.

Again Googled, This is already a bill introduced in the General Assembly, so we are not really sure why he’s touting it. Except he doesn’t like to miss a chance to tell us how evil and mean the teacher’s union is. Good luck with that one Exalted District 5 Commander!

We also have some legislation about school vouchers, education spending accounts and the ability to shift money around local construction projects. We’ll leave you with the bottom of his press release:

For additional information please contact Council Member Kirby Delauter at 301-600-1034 or via e-mail at KDelauter@FrederickCountyMD.gov

He’s asking for you to contact him folks! Don’t disappoint him!

Bruce Lee once said showing off is the fool’s idea of glory. Your September 6 county council run down.

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Continue reading “Bruce Lee once said showing off is the fool’s idea of glory. Your September 6 county council run down.” →

But we were told Frederick County was the most business unfriendly entity on the face of the EARTH!

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We’ve been told by Blaine, Kirby and Billy that Frederick County is CLOSED for business. We’ve been told that our county is the most business unfriendly entity on the face of our entire planet. We’ve been told that our County Executive is a big vindictive meanie that targets businesses who flagrantly rip up our county’s regulations and set them on fire. So how can this story in the FNP be true? You can read it for yourselves, but we’ve pulled out the nice little chart for you:

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Someone is wrong. Who could it be?

What do hotels, marijuana, solar panels and zoning have in common? Welcome to your August 30th drinking game!

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Happy now Shrelauter?!
Happy now Shrelauter?!

Since the council returned from their break, we’ve heard some pretty dumb things. We are still trying to recover from Billy telling us that we can safely drink from any stream in the county, when we clearly CANNOT. What misinformation is in store for our tender little ears this week? Grab a copy of your trusty agenda, pull up next to your favorite reality channel and batten down the hatches! And as always, this game is just for fun! No passing out in the alleys!

The very beginning of our evening begins behind closed doors. The council will interview a County Executive appointee. In honor of the torture this poor soul is about to embark on, who will have to endure some “interesting” questions from the entity we call Shrelauter, warm yourself up with a Secret Garden Cocktail. 

Not sure why they bother calling the meeting to order since a few will never abide. We begin with public comment, some idiot either abstaining or refusing to vote on the consent agenda and then the approval of three budget transfers. No school transfers this week so  Kirby won’t have the opportunity to throw out his dead horse speech about the teachers on the council lining their pockets. Oh what a shame!

Dr. Monica Grant is up for approval for the Director of the Citizens Service Director. Read more about her here.  

We have one first reading on a program Regarding Establishment of a Clean Energy Loan Program for Commercial Properties. Then the council has to make some decisions.

First up is the Adequate Facilities Code. When Kirby laments the fact that his super expensive plan to fund four schools was killed, shoot back some Tough to Hear shots. It’s really becoming tiresome isn’t it?

Next up, Jerry has a plan to make zoning changes more public, so people have a chance to actually know what’s going on in their neighborhoods. “Shouldn’t” be any problems with this, but if there is, mix yourself up a B-52.

Time to decide on the marijuana pilot program. We heard some rumor that the High Sheriff was on the radio saying that prostitution should be legal, however, pot is a danger this county should never know. When we get confirmation on whether or not our top law enforcement officer really thinks a plant is more dangerous than the abuse and degradation of poor, disadvantaged people we’ll certainly let you know. For now just have your self a Elixir Bloody Mary, because we all need our vitamins.

If you have seen any of these Facebook hotel accounts, you know that the proposed downtown hotel is a touchy subject for some. However, many people came out in support of raising this tax, so we are fairly certain it’s a done deal. If the talk gets a little dicey, slam back a Stinger.

If this doesn’t get us to 7:00, Billy will complain and moan about how Bud can’t foresee the exact time a meeting will take and we’ll want to slam every clock over that head of his! Yes, Billy we all know how busy you are, and none of us gives a rat’s ass.

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Billy, ranting about nothing just makes you look stoooopid.

Two public hearings on the agenda. Zoning, Adequate Facilities and Developer Rights are wrapped up all in one. The second deals with Solar Panel Installation. We’ll let your livers rest during this section of the evening. We do predict, however, that the second hearing will go smoother than the first.

Public comment and then what seems to do us in, Council Member comment. Before the C.M comment section of the evening commences fortify yourself with a Snickertini. For the only way to get through this mess anymore is to laugh.

 

You broke our poll record!! Now it’s time for a new one!

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Well, well, well…it seems that our last poll about Blaine got a lot of people’s attention. For we had never had so many people participate before. Here’s your results:

Continue reading “You broke our poll record!! Now it’s time for a new one!” →

Oh what a coinkydink!

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Cinnamon, we really don’t know where you come up with these crazy ideas!!! Nobody could possibly believe that!!!

Tuesday will bring us dueling human trafficking events. In one corner we have this:

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That’s right! It’s finally time for Blaine to face a judge over his prostitution arrest. Some may say that he’s irrelevant here in the county, seeing as how Jan trounced him in the last election. However, many birdies have told us that he wishes to become the shiny brand new District 5 Council representative once Kirby gets his butt whooped in the County Executive contest. So as long as he keeps trying to creep back into elected office, we will be here to remind you what a catastrophic mistake that would be.

Keep District 5 Blaine free!
Keep District 5 Blaine free!

The second event is an attempt to deal with the very real problem of human trafficking here in Frederick County:

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We highly recommend that you read through these pages and become educated on the problem. For this is a subject that is very dear to your Lady Yokel’s hearts. We firmly believe that   no person such be forced into any kind of slavery, sexual or otherwise.

Our faithful readers will remember back when a vote was taken on having this workshop. Billy voted against it because, and we quote, “There are groups both for and against this.” Jerry and Jessica were both incredulous as were we!  (Of course we kinda suspect this was all a cover to protect Blaine and his transgressions). There couldn’t possibly be people in favor of human trafficking, could there?  We are very sad to report that Billy may just be right. For those of you who are not yet acquainted with the watchdog group Frederick County Council Watch Watch you need to click on over and take a look. This page watches the Frederick County Council Watch page, and believe it or not  they have found people who think this whole human trafficking workshop is a huge conspiracy. Including a few people who are running for public office in these here parts.  

Look what you did to Spongebob and Patrick! Aren't you ashamed people!
Look what you did to Spongebob and Patrick! Aren’t you ashamed people!

As always, we’ll let you know the outcome of both the trial and the workshop. There is never a dull moment in Frederick politics.

All the dead horses fit to be beaten were trotted out after the long council break

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This meeting started with all the regular malarkey. There was a grand opening event in the first public comment section. Thanks be to Yokel reader and frequent public commenter Patrick Schempp. He came with audio effects so that we could all hear Blaine Young at the last BOCC meeting brag about how he screwed us all for generations to come. That’s may be a slight paraphrase, but not at all a mischaracterization of the attitude. The AV Club presentation ran a little long, so by the fourth minute of the meeting Billy had already started his insolent griping at Bud about controlling the meeting. I think Mr. Schempp must’ve hurt Billy’s feelings…

Sorry to have to keep using this one folks. But it's kinda not our fault.
Sorry to have to keep using this one folks. But it’s kinda not our fault.

And then came the consent items, and Kirby took the opportunity to wail on the most brittle skeletal remains of his favorite dead horse. One of the consent items involved BOE money and that was going to affect Jerry and Jessica’s salaries. Oh. Mon. Dieu. How many times are we going to go over this? But he knows. He just wants the public to know that if they vote on the whole consent agenda one of the line items will give money to the BOE to decide what to do with it, and years down the road the teachers on the Council may benefit from it. Probably maybe eventually they will see seventeen cents more than they had yesterday. Shut up, Kirby. Shut. Up. We are bored of your stupidity. Jerry and Jessica both responded, kind of the same way they always do when Kirby pulls this crap (oh, consent items passed, in spite of time wasted).

Other Shrelauter horse carcass flogging included the continued denial of the science of water. Why should we comply with the Clean Water Act? Again (and this is a review for Kirby, too–goodness no wonder they have no respect for education issues, look how it helped them comprehend nothing at all). To ignore the problems with erosion and pollution that Shrelauter disbelieves, there are significant fines and prison time at stake. Why be bothered with reality, though. Also Billy says it is good thing that they have learned some of our local streams are polluted by animals. Tony jovially concluded that they need to shoot more deer. The thing is, we are pretty that you are NOT just allowed to go shoot the domesticated bovines standing in area streams, and their pies are so much more copious than the fewmets left by deer. But harharhar. Thriving animal populations or whatever. This is a positive spin a la “the Grand Canyon is beautiful and caused by erosion.” Psst Billy: our troubles here are generally caused by sediment deposition. Also, according to Billy our water is obviously fine. “No one has died.” (true story) O.K. Please explain how we are to listen to your possibly lead poisoned brain thoughts and reach the same “it’s all good” conclusion. We’ll be waiting…

A new and head-scratching thing occurred during the discussion concerning the payment in lieu of tax agreement to establish workforce housing on North Market Street. Billy seemed at a loss when he was told about fair housing laws. This means incentives can’t be given to certain classes of people. He was hoping it would be guaranteed somehow that the available units would be filled by teachers, nurses and first responders of the highest workforce caliber and obviously not some ambiguous lesser riffraff. Indignantly, he demanded to know what laws. This ignorance was shocking to your yokels, only because we have bought houses and dealt with realtors. Then we remembered: Billy is a realtor. We don’t know if our jaws will ever come off the floor.

A quick and dirty guide to the hot topics:

Everybody likes the hotel tax. Except Randy Cohen of the Holiday Inn (can’t really blame him for that, but try as he might that Holiday Inn is not going to move itself downtown, so…). He did bring a couple of friends. One of them was so angry about Redheaded Eskimos.

Nobody likes the medical marijuana pilot program. They all came out of the woodwork to say so.

Council member comments at the end of the evening had us laughing so hard we were unable to breathe and nearly passed out from lack of oxygen. Kirby is still complaining about his lease back option getting nixed. And just because it was obviously a terrible idea from the first day! Billy had a lot to say, and this post would be twice as long if we just focused on that (see yourself at 5 hours 43 minutes, no, that is not a typo). Jessica ducked out because of new motherhood, and she honestly must have been miserable by that point and probably wouldn’t have even been able to laugh at her neighbor on the dias. We highly recommend that she does as promised and goes back to watch them. Of course she will. She is a responsible council person.

There is another phrase kind of like beating a dead horse, but it is much cruder and involves a chicken. If this redundant stuff continues, we may be forced to drag that ghastly thing out. We can’t keep being forced to say the same things over and over again just because Shrelauter hasn’t had a fresh thought in over a year.