Who do you think is “Without Merit”?

This morning’s Political News is chock full of good info. First of all, over the weekend, your Lady Yokels were alerted to the fact that Delegate Kathy Afzali shut the doors during the beginning part of the Delegation’s public hearing. When County Executive Gardner arrived at Winchester Hall and saw about 50 people outside the closed doors, she let them in. By that time, it appears, the part of the meeting Delegate Afzali didn’t want out in the open was over. What was the secret part of the meeting about you ask? It was to select a Chairperson and Vice Chairperson for the Frederick County Delegation. Typically, this is a Republican and a Democrat and one delegate and one senator. This time, however, two Republican delegates were chosen. The paper quoted Delegate Karen Lewis Young’s reaction:

“I think the public should have seen what transpired before that meeting. Because that election was determined in advance,” Lewis Young said. “And there were several arguments that the minority brought forward that should have been public.”

Those arguments included an appeal that the delegation’s leadership has a tradition of being bipartisan (one Democrat, one Republican) and bicameral (one senator, one delegate), neither of which will continue for the 2017 session.

Delegate Afzali says that if she gave the security guard the impression that the public was to be locked out it was just a “misunderstanding.”

1fn4r1

Secondly, the Political Notes alerts us to what we knew all along. Billy’s sexual harassment claim was found to be “without merit.” Just like him!!!

717a1d716d8adc1bca7960adaba06d655a1ec50d238265d60a4d9cbf05e713d0
This People’s Court is NOT impressed Billy!

Seriously Billy, you need to turn over a new leaf in 2017. Find something constructive to do on the council. Stop being rude,stop grandstanding, start reading and do the job you were elected to do!  Now that you won’t be distracted by the election or the central committee you have lots of time to improve yourself! The citizens of Frederick County deserve better.

You didn’t think we were going to get off easy tonight, did ya!? Your December 6th meeting roundup!

We previously posted who will be the president and vice president of the county council for the next two years. In case you missed it, Bud will remain president and M.C. will keep her position as vice president. Now, we will we recount the severe pain that it took to get us to this result.

When nominations were first called we had this slate:

M.C. nominates Bud

Tony nominates M.C.

Kirby nominates Billy

If only these three names could have just gone to a vote. Maybe then a little piece of our faith in humankind would still be intact. But the world is a topsy turvy place and things are often out of control. So in that spirit; Enter Tony stage right!

Tony wants M.C. to explain her nomination of Bud. She replies that while she appreciates Tony’s nomination, issues in her personal life would keep her from performing the job in the manner she believes it should be performed. Tony, oh so sensitively, lets her know that since she was elected she should be able to give the time. He presses her to justify her nomination which results in her stating that Bud has the patience, tenacity and skills necessary for this job. Well, this was all a big set up for some “prepared” remarks that Tony has about Bud.

120kq6
We wish we had some warning beforehand!

Tony recites a list of all his grievances with the way the council works and Bud himself. He accuses the others on the council of having back door meetings with the County Executive. But what’s the prob guys, Tony also said he doesn’t mean any disrespect. He’ll just accuse away and then say please don’t take that the wrong way. So it’s all good right?

Jessica alerts us to the fact that all these “back door ” meetings have the Chief of Staff present whom kindly takes notes that everyone can read. Then Shreve chimes in. Whines about Bud telling him to get on his knees. States that if this kind of language is appropriate for our children to see then he is going to start (!) using it on the dais. And we would be remiss if we didn’t point out that Billy was Trump’s #1 fan! So it’s clear that saying terrible things does not bother Billy one little bit.  We are then informed that because of everything Bud has done Trump won! There is an absolute direct correlation between these two things! Billy’s just spewing them facts!

Kirby also wants us to know that no one in the leadership called or emailed him except when they threatened his business. Wonder why that could be? Tis truly baffling. Also, shouts out one of his many trademark phrases: “We are just a rubber stamp to the County Executive!”

M.C. addresses this rubber stamp claim quite succinctly. She explains to Kirby that the council pushes back on the County Executive plenty. When meetings take place concerning  bills to be introduced they compromise and collaborate. Therefore, by the time the bill reaches the council many of the issues have already been hashed out. But what’s that worth if you don’t get to do it publicly?  How’s an idiot to grandstand ?15354217_10154462793367599_242526508_o

Anyhoo, votes are cast and Bud is the winner. Bud then nominates M.C. for VP and Kirby nominates Tony and thankfully M.C. emerges the winner with no more drama. We must apologize for our drinking game this evening. For if you followed it you probably were not conscious for the remainder of the meeting.

Next up is council member comments. But before we get there, we feel the need to share what the editorial page of the newspaper is for. It is not reporting in the sense that one needs to be objective. It is the OPINION page of the newspaper. The place where readers and the editorial board can post their OPINIONS.  In case that isn’t clear here’s an article from How Stuff Works that may explain it better than we can. The reason we need to clear that up is that three of our council members are truly confused about the function of the Editorial Page.

Tony is flabbergasted that the FNP would lump him in with Shrelauter. He takes special exception over an online comment posted by a READER of the paper:

“Chmelik is just as bad as Shreve and Delauter. He is with them plotting and planning in secret with Blaine Young behind the scenes on how best to obstruct any progress at all.”

Now Tony wants to the FNP to investigate before they print stuff like this! Hear that FNP ?You have now been tasked with the responsibility to investigate all online comments. Good luck! Tony also wants to know how the FNP would know that he meets in secret with the fellas. This is then followed by some nervous laughter because he probably just realized he invited a Gary Hart like challenge to the press.

Kirby starts normal style. Talks about a road meeting he attended, offers condolences to the loved ones of someone he knew, but it’s not to last. There’s some talk in the county about taking some easements around the Monocacy River in order to clean the river up. You know the dreaded water buffers. About 300 homeowners will be affected in Frederick and Carroll counties. Now mind you, this is only a recommendation. No legislation has been proposed, no hearings held, just a group of people thinking of solutions to the river’s pollution. Well, its enough for Kirby to shout out:

“Environmentalism is the new Socialism”

youreaspecialkindofstupidarentyou_f410588eebd315cfe6baa5e560b98c48
Tell him Harry!

Then to prove that Bud’s comment about constituency services is all wrong, Kirby is going to read on and on and on and on and on and on from a list that the council uses to record when a citizen calls in, what the problem is and how that problem was addressed. Curiously, he focuses on Jerry’s calls with one of Bud’s thrown in. He wants to know why Jerry has special privileges (more on that soon) that he doesn’t seem to have. Assures us that he’s going to try his best for the next two years to tell us all what is correct!

Jerry let’s us know the source of his magical powers that allow him to get information  from county staff. He simply uses the words please and thank you.

14017833_1273894092622171_386452464_n
That’s P-L-E-A-S-E and T-H-A-N-K_Y-O-U Kirby!

It really is astounding how much you can get done when you are nice to people.

Billy is threatening to actually write legislation to establish a People’s Court. But does remind us that it will take quite some time before such magical legislation appears. He also goes off on the Editorial Board of the FNP. Shreve claims that he had a meeting with the new Editorial Editor (because you know what a big meanie Cliff Cumber was to him) and he was assured that he would be treated fairly. (Man, to be a fly on the wall during that meeting!) And now the new meanie Editor is still saying horrible things too! Why does the conspiracy to point out all the stupid things that Billy does continue?

Jessica talks about hosting some Boy Scouts at Winchester Hall (and we saw some pics, curiously enough no political signs were involved). She also brings up the list Kirby was reading off of. You know the one that PROVED that Jerry got all this special treatment. Well lo and behold guess who else’s name is on said list? That’s right, Old Hashtag himself! With his very own problems and resolutions. Good gravy this guy!

M.C. reminds “someone” that you get more flies with honey than vinegar. And also , that sometimes it’s better to bite your tongue and not say anything. Wink, nudge Billy.

Bud clears up his comment about the council not being a constituency service. He explains that when he worked in Congress they had all of the government organizations open to them in order to help people resolve issues. However, the way the charter is written, all citizen concerns need to go through the County Executive’s  office. The council can of course hear the complaints, but aside of writing legislation to fix grievances, it is the charter mandated responsibility of the County Executive to handle constituent problems.

Now back to the rubber stamp comment that Kirby made earlier. Bud has some numbers about all that. In 2015, 11 bills were passed 9 of which passed with a super majority. Only 2 were passed with the 4-3 breakdown. So far this year, 14 bills were passed with 11 passing with a super majority and only 3 with the 4-3 breakdown that Kirby so laments. But don’t let numbers get in the way of your complaining.

Next meeting is Tuesday, December 13th. Same bat time, same bat channel.

 

Better go grab that liquor before it’s all gone! Your December 6th drinking fun!

eae05f0a8b82216f6116ec6fe45f888194ff970973672a45c5d33249bf7172b3

If you had a chance to see last Sunday’s paper, you would have noticed a front page story and an editorial about the dysfunction  Kirby and Billy cause on our beloved county council. The big story this evening is the election of a county council president and vice president. No one seems to know which way the wind is blowing on this one, so your Lady Yokels are very, very nervous. Not because Kirby and/or Billy could obtain either one of those positions, but because of the potential for some flinging o’ the insults. Grab your agenda and let’s start from the beginning.

If there is any drama during the public comments, budget transfers, approval of minutes or confirmation of the County Executive appointment, take really big gulps of your Failure cocktail.

Now for the drama of the evening. Straight from the Charter here are the steps necessary to vote for the president and  vice president:

2016-12-04 (2).png

1fc9pi
We are nervous too Pancakes!

Do you see why your Lady Yokels are nervous?! There is no way in Hades’ cold underworld that this is going to go well. Every single time one of the three potential trouble makers (that’s right we said three!) cause some drama guzzle down your Jack Frost. Things are about to get super icy in Winchester Hall!

Believe it or not they are going to try and do some more work after this! There’s the first reading of a bill to give small businesses a real property tax credit. Now, Billy and Kirby commonly lament the plight of the small business owner. But alas, a Democrat has introduced it so there’s no way they can support it now! If any objections are made, and none should be made during a first reading, slam back a Fall of Rome. 

Motion to go into closed session will be voted against by the resident fool. And onto public comment we go.

If you are still looking for that perfect gift for your Local Yokel reader, visit our store on Zazzle! 

2016-11-30-2

Giving Tuesday, Yo!

Over the weekend we highlighted the Emerge Maryland Virtual Bath Bombs to support women candidates. Suggestion: if you are participating in Giving Tuesday, perhaps you might like to give a Bath Bomb in the name of #Kirby Delauter, if you are feeling the super saucy holiday Local Yokel spirit! And in that vein, we have a few other ideas.

A nice lady from Stop Child Predators wrote an LTE commending the Council decision to set up a task force on human trafficking. It would be an excellent idea to send them some $$$ in honor of our most ridiculous former county commissioner/prostitution aficionado/aspiring D5 councilperson.

A donation to the NAACP in honor of Tony Chmelik. Why? No reason. No reason at all.

And last but not least, a donation to Frederick County Public Libraries in honor of Billy Shreve.

Middle finger!
Middle finger!

 

 

To be or not to be a hypocrite

30e5e6af60777ddb82abe0ab94f4710c

The local Republican Central Committee, steered by our own Billy Shreve, has had a quite a bit of the drama lately. Things came to a head last night when certain members of the committee, in the spirit of Trump (their words), are attempting to “drain the swamp” of those they no longer want on the committee. Third world dictator accusations were slung, lawyers were called and state delegates shut down. What we are interested in are the new by laws that were adopted at last night’s Drama Fest 2016:

  • Causing harm to the “reputation and good name” of the Republican party “as it pertains to official business.”
  • Verbally harassing or abusing committee members in “in plain view of the public” or during an open session of the committee.
  • Disclosing remarks made by any committee member during a session closed to the public without explicit permission from the person who made those statements.

Nice use of the scare quotes! Now what we want to see Billy do is propose these changes to the county charter. Just imagine these new by-laws when it comes to our own county council:

  • Causing harm to the reputation and good name of the Frederick County Council as it pertains to official business.
  • Verbally harassing or abusing council members in plain view of the public or during an open meeting of the Frederick County Council.
  • Disclosing remarks made made by any council member during a session closed to the public without explicit permission from the person who made those statements.

What’s good enough for the Republican Central Committee is good enough for the council! We can’t let there be any double standards!

tumblr_inline_mm7h7m8z0r1qz4rgp

Poll time! Who said this terrible thing?

The Extra Buzz on thefrederickextra.rocks.com has us all atwitter this evening. There is a report of an overheard conversation of one of our esteemed county council members. Take a little peek:

Overheard at a recent government-style gathering [paraphrased]: Civilian to County Council Member: I might like to live on a farm someday. What’s that like? CCMember: Sharecropping went out about 100 years ago [actually, it’s more like 60.] The civilian was black.

There really are only two choices.
It’s not who you think!

This mystery calls for a poll! Who do you think said this terrible thing?

Billy and Kirby embarrass Frederick County. Edition 20,000,000,001.

It’s all so upsetting to us when we learn that Billy and Kirby’s antics have leaked out of the county. Like a toxic spill, we hope that we can contain their nonsense within our borders. Apparently, that was just wishful thinking. In today’s FNP there is a brilliant LTE by the president of Stop Child Predators, an organization based in Washington, DC. In her letter, Stacie Rumenap,  praises the thoughtful, caring and deliberate members of the council while taking our two local nincompoops to task! Just a taste:

One member, Councilman Billy Shreve, not only voted against this measure, but he made outrageous comments stating that there are groups on both sides of human trafficking and there are groups in favor of human trafficking.

Make room Peppermint, we want to hide too!
Make room Peppermint, we want to hide too!

We are so sorry rest of the world! We promise to make things better in 2018!

Best frenemies!

So obviously you’ve probably noticed we have Republican friends and Democratic friends, but we ourselves are pretty libby lib. People have been bemoaning the polarization in America today, and it isn’t hard to find examples of that, but around here more often than not there are things at the local level that we can find to bridge the gap. And one of those things is Billy Shreve!

Just look at how our counterparts over at Red Maryland think the exact same thing about Shreve that we do! Namely, he is “asinine,” plus this part that sounds just like something we might have written:

…it has been proven time and time again this year that when it comes to being a member of the Central Committee that Billy Shreve can always fail to meet the lowest of expectations.

He kinda loses us when he goes on to call the Houghs, “a popular State Senator and his wife…” That’s a bridge too far for us, but hey, we will stay tuned to whatever Red Maryland wants to dish up for either half of the Shrelauter faction.

This part we probably should keep on the down low, but there are some words of wisdom here that ring true (along with the implication we again agree with that Billy is a man-child):

It’s fortunate that Shreve is not intending to serve another year as Chairman because it’s clear that Frederick County, a county that is vitally important to the re-election of Governor Hogan in 2018, needs an adult to lead it for the next two years.

But, neener neener, I am the new chair of the Republican Central Committee. 2016 is probably gonna be my year. heh heh heh
An oldie, but a goodie.

 

Can ya take a minute to ring up the Governor?

It’s a time for a full scale Yokel call to action folks! Our governor, Larry Hogan, was decidedly anti-Trump throughout this whole campaign season. Even to the point that our own Billy Shreve was trying to shame the governor into throwing his support behind the Orange Menace. Well now that we are here and there’s been one horrible appointment after another, this is what the Baltimore Sun reports that our brave leader advises the residents of Maryland to do:

Gov. Larry Hogan, offering rare public comments about the election of Republican Donald J. Trump, said Monday that “everyone ought to take a deep breath.”

sometimes-you-just-have-to-close-your-eyes-count-to-ten-take-a-deep-breath-remind-yourself-that-you-wouldn-t-look-good-in-prison-stripes-and-just-smile-at-that-2

We don’t know about you, but a deep breath was necessary after reading that! Guess what Guv?We are not going to take a deep breath when the proprietor of a hate filled, misogynistic website is named the President’s Chief Strategist! We will not take a deep breath when a man who called the 1965 Civil Rights Act a piece of “intrusive legislation” is tapped to lead the Justice Department!  And we certainly will not take a deep breath as the worst of the worst around us spews hate at our fellow human beings.

Our State Attorney General has opened a hotline for Marylanders to report any hate crimes. In his statement on this issue Attorney General Frosh wrote:

“Over the last week, reports of hate incidents directed at racial and ethnic minorities, Muslims, Jews, women, immigrants, and the LGBT community have increased. Sadly, Maryland is not immune to this outbreak, and it is important to remember that our laws prohibit this kind of conduct and provide protection from it”.

And don’t think we’ve been immune to it here in Frederick. Two recent FNP stories have shown otherwise.

We think the governor needs to be made aware how insulting and condescending his just take a “deep breath” comment is. If you agree please take a minute and give his office a call at 410-974-3901. Or if email is your preferred method of contact this link will take you to a contact form. Let the governor know that we here in Maryland will not tolerate him telling us to “take a deep breath”.

Smuckers demands action!
Smuckers demands action!

 

Time for your favorite game: Doubling Down on the Dumb Dumbs with Billy Shreve!

If you’ve read our coverage of the past county council meetings you know that Billy has advocated for a People’s Court. We’ve talked previously about how way out of the scope of his legislative powers this idea lies. But alas:

Doubling down on the dumb ideas does not make them smart Billy!
Doubling down on the dumb ideas does not make them smart Billy!

So let us try to explain this to you Sir! The County Executive is the Executive Branch of the County Government. The Executive Branch is responsible for enforcing the laws. The court system is the Judicial Branch. The branch responsible for solving disputes between citizens and the county, citizens and citizens, etc and so on. Your job, as a county council member, falls under the LEGISLATIVE BRANCH. You are responsible for making laws! You have the power to craft legislation. If this still isn’t clear watch these two videos:

http://www.pbs.org/video/2365005484/

Or if you prefer going old school, there’s always School House Rock. Maybe a song will make it stick!

2016-11-21-5

Now your Lady Yokels are going to have some fun imagining what would occur if such a People’s Court should come to fruition.

salem-witch-trials-lithograph-715-jpg__600x0_q85_upscale
Why Billy Why?

Let’s imagine an upstanding citizen can no longer take the fact that his neighbor keeps using his side yard as a toilet!

Shreve: What brings you here to Frederick’s People’s Court?

Plantiff Hatfield: My no account next door neighbor will not stop peeing in his yard. I’ve called Jan Gardner, but for some reason she won’t sit in the bushes with me and wait for it to happen again.  It’s frightening the missus and making an unsightly brown patch that has migrated onto my property.

Defendant McCoy: It’s my property! And my wife said I could do it!

Shreve: You said you called Jan Gardner and she refused to come out? See how unresponsive our county government…

County Lawyer (Or anyone who paid attention during their high school civics class): If I may interject. There are public decency laws in play here. Next time the offending neighbor is urinating you have the option to call the Sheriff. The Deputy can then issue a citation.Then the offender will have to go through the already well established court system to receive his punishment. Have you tried that route?

Plantiff Hatfield: Billy you said you could help!

Case Closed!
Case Closed!

Just imagine that scenario over and over and over again no matter what the complaint! Billy you can certainly help the public when it comes to changing or making a law to remedy an ill. However, you do not have the power (or the temperament, or the experience, or the knowledge) to adjudicate disputes!!!! Maybe schedule a lunch with Scott Rolle so he can explain it all to you!