Are you ready for this?

This is becoming a theme. Derp.

This clip of an interview by WMAL with Frederick’s own High Sheriff Chuck Jenkins is something else. The first thing that jumps out is that WMAL can’t spell Frederick County.  It’s not Fredrick. Once we recovered from seeing this error, and managed to listen we were  excited  concerned to hear his thoughts on school security in the wake of Parkland.

He made it clear that he feels the buck stops with him for any actions/inactions done by deputies whom he had trained and that work for him. Our first thought in hearing this was remembering the death of Ethan Saylor.  The sheriff may have publicly commented on his feelings about that, but all we could find was that he said they need to revise the way deputies were trained.

Check out this part from the link we posted:

As the interview continued, Sheriff Jenkins addressed Sheriff Israel’s actions of politicizing the incident:

O’Connor: I think many people are sort of scrutinizing Sheriff Israel right now because it appears as though he knew about those breakdowns last week, but he still did that nationally televised political event where he was basically blaming the NRA, blaming politicians, he was kind of partisan. Do you think that was appropriate for him?

Sheriff Jenkins: No, I don’t. Again, I think we all have our political beliefs and ideologies but you keep them separate from the actual events that you’re addressing. And some of the statements he said, he made, I don’t think were really appropriate. Again, I wasn’t there. I’m not in his shoes. But I can tell you, you don’t turn a situation like that into politics and you don’t blame the NRA because it’s not a gun control issue. The very basic issues are these:

  1. How do you limit access of firearms to individuals that shouldn’t have them in their hands?
  2. How do we harden the security at our schools to eliminate the threats to our students and staff?

There are a number of ways to do it, but again I don’t think you make it political.

How are guns not a political issue? The sheriff is making it political himself when he mentions limiting access. You can’t limit access without changing laws. Of course this is a political issue.

The sheriff announced plans to bring a proposal to the Board of Education to put an armed and trained security force of 5 or 6 into each and every school. This is how he thinks he will keep our kids safe. We reached out to Karl Bickel, democratic candidate for Frederick County Sheriff to see what he thinks of this idea. Karl didn’t want to give a final opinion on it since it is just a thought at the moment, but he did say it felt like a knee-jerk reaction.  “It sounds like an ill-conceived idea that is fraught with problems that would put students, staff and any officers (deputies) in even greater danger.” We tend to agree. We’ll stand by to see what the sheriff presents to the board.

This is funny. Student safety is not.

Please come to the “education townhall” devoid of ideas

Make our schools like 1950 again!

Perpetual BOE Candidate You Know Who is planning an “education townhall” on Feb 27th from 6:00-8:00 p.m. at the C. Burr Artz public library. Since it’s at the library it’s required to be open to anyone who wants to attend, so please share widely. Surely it will be… uh…educational. It is worth noting that Cindy Rose filed today to run again for the Board of Education. I guess her previous losses left her wanting more of the same so let’s make sure she finally gets the message that we don’t want her on our board.

Topics to discuss are a bullet list of how to feel aggrieved. This means you are in luck if you hate those people who have a great idea that they will volunteer anyone but themselves to do the legwork on. This is an exclusive event for the airing of grievances, entirely free of action items.

– Do you or did you feel left out of your child’s education? (Would you still feel left out of it if you weren’t involved in litigation/exchanging eleventy bazillion emails with the FCPS Administration and BOE during times that other people are at PTA meetings or assisting in classrooms?)

– Are you currently disappointed in what your child is learning? Were you disappointed in what your child was learning? (Do you think it unnecessary and frightening to learn facts about things that have vast geopolitical ramifications, such as the world’s largest religion? Does learning a different way than you were taught 40 years ago frighten and disgust you?)

– Do you or did you feel you were not a partner in your child’s education? (If you did feel that you were a partner in education, on a scale of 1 to 10 how frightened were you of the school restrooms?)

Please come out and share your thoughts and concerns with local community members and education activists, whether or not you received the personalized pitchfork and tiki torch invite.

Local Yokel suggested items to discuss:

How about brainstorming on ideas that will make you a real partner in education instead of an adversary?

What can the community do to help alleviate over-testing?

What can I do to help advocate for more education budget dollars to attract and keep the best teachers in Frederick County?

How can I make sure that all kids have access to the appropriate learning level?

How can I contribute to ensuring we have adequate schools for our growing county?

If you have your own wishlist of items, please plan to attend. We’d love to hear how your feedback at the meeting is received.

Oh, please, please, question it.

It’s been awhile. Do you remember how to drinking game?

Oh, Max is ready to play along. Can we get thinking cats for certain council members? They really need them.


It is sometimes difficult to tell by reading the agenda, but tonight’s meeting looks like it could be a real doozy. So take care of your liver. As always, this game is just for giggles. Actually participating in this to the fullest may result in death. You’ve been warned.

The meeting starts as always with public comments. We aren’t going to hold our breath on anyone actually showing up to speak. Just hold your beer, just in case.

A bunch of budget adjustments on first up on the agenda.  Billy will  complain about the library grant because everyone knows folks go to Borders instead, Kirby will kvetch about Citizens, blah, blah, blah. Mix yourself a kitchen sink.

Next up on the agenda, approval of minutes for 4 meetings. When Billy abstains mix yourself up a flaming asshole.

Now, it’s time to discuss a mutual aid agreement between the Fred Co Sheriff, Wash Co Sheriff and Hagerstown City Police. Where are the Fred City Police? Make yourself a missing in action while you ponder that.

Well, well well, it’s time to take a vote on the Maryland Association of Counties Legislative Committee County Council Representation. What? Didn’t Bud already executive decision this? Things could get snippy. Make yourself a T-bone in anticipation of Bud’s phone ringing with its Bad to the Bone ringtone.

What workshop items are in store for us? We don’t know what these are as they aren’t listed on the agenda. This might be a good time to hydrate with some good old water.

Time to look at a petition to close a portion of Old Frederick Road to improve the safety of Route 15. Pick your favorite drink and stick it in a cone when anyone complains about being inconvenienced by this proposal.

Lots of First Readings on the docket! Including those that Billy decided he better get going on before anyone brought up the fact that he did nothing but ABSTAIN during his entire tenure as a council member. Anyhoo, sip on your Lazy Daze while you endure this portion of the evening.

It’s time to vote on the dueling Forest Ordinance bills. With Bud’s voting patterns recently altered, we predict his version will be the one to make it through; Sip on your Forest Funk while you think of all the lost trees.

Before the break, they will vote to pull the Adequate Public Facilities bill, and then Billy will vote against going into closed session. If it isn’t too close to 7:00, we may get treated to Billy complaining about having to waste all his precious time at Winchester Hall.

MDX hearing is the last bit of business this evening. There’s a lot of opposition to this bill because it would theoretically allow a warehouse to go next to a school or a housing development. Mainly, it’s introduction has to do with the fact that the Jefferson Technology Park did not fill up the way the previous BOCC claimed it would. While you listen to the arguments mix up a pitcher of Nuclear Disaster, and think of all the bad things the Young BOCC have brought upon this fine county.

Public and council member comments can get a little dicey, however, you’ve been through enough for one evening.

Don’t end up like Jonesy.



Holiday Inspirations, part 4.

This is not fishing!

This continues our ongoing series to share some of our own Yokel family traditions to help you get in the holiday spirit.

Cousin Earl really likes to fish. Well,  truth be told, he likes to drink beer in peace, and going fishing provides him with peace and quiet to drink to his content. What does that have to do with the Yokel family Christmas? Well cousin Earl brings his favorite fishing snack to our annual gathering.

Beer pickled eggs are the perfect protein to keep you fortified while fishing and to share while waiting for dinner.

Cousin Earl’s Pickled Eggs

2 dozen hard boiled eggs, peeled

1.5 cans of beer

2 cups vinegar

Red pepper flakes

Boil and peel eggs. Cousin Earl thinks you should already know how to did this, so use the interweb if you can’t boil a damn egg.  Mix beer, vinegar and red pepper flakes in a big her. Add eggs. Drink extra half can of beer. Let eggs sit a day or 2. Eat. Repeat.

Maybe Cousin Earl will make some for you too.

Holiday inspiration, part 3.

Did you know you can buy stills on the interweb? We found this one at

This continues our ongoing series to share some of our own Yokel family traditions to help you get in the holiday spirit.

If you have see an episode of Moonshiners, you may recognize the purpose of the still we included am image of above. This edition of Yokel Holiday Inspirations is inspired by Aunt Mildred’s moonshine.

Aunt Mildred is a distant Yokel with a not so legal habit of distilling her own shine to share at the holidays. We can’t share her recipe here, she keeps that in her head, plus moonshining is not exactly a legal backyard gathering that we can endorse.

We are thankful that over the years. Aunt Mildred has hauled her moonshine across several state lines  at great person risk, just to spread with your local Yokels.

If you want to start your own holiday moonshine tradition, head to your local liquor store to buy yourself a legal version.

No, no, no, Professor Whiskers! Did you even read this post?


Holiday Inspiration, part 2.

Orange booz
Just like Aunt Gloria, you can pretend you are French when you bake with this.

This continues our ongoing series to share some of our own Yokel family traditions to help you get in the holiday spirit.

Today’s feature is from Aunt Gloria. She loves to bring dessert to our holiday gatherings. Aunt Gloria has a fondness for all things orange. Her holiday treat features Grand Marnier. It is safe to say she samples a lot while making this yummy version of pound cake. Measure the flour, take a sip. Measure the sugar, take a sip. You get the idea. Please make sure you save some for the cake!

You’ll find Aunt Gloria’s recipe here. She may be a good baker, but she is not original. You can recognize Aunt Gloria by her orange blossom perfume and by the hiccups she gets when she bakes this cake.

Drunk cat
No, no, no! Do not feed this to Mr. Jingles!

Holiday inspiration, Yokel style.

Picard yummy

This holiday season we are going to share some of our own Yokel family traditions to help you get in the holiday spirit. This will be an ongoing series of one special daily recipe. You may even want to pull some of these items out to help you get through a council meeting.

Our first tasty item is from the kitchen of Uncle Fred. Good ole Fred would make huge batches of this to send home with everyone every Christmas. He told us it was beef, but I’m not sure if that is what he used every year. We learned not to ask as Uncle Fred had a fondness for anything he could hunt for himself. One year, I accidently found out he used groundhog after being hired by several neighbors to help them with a groundhog infestation.  Anyway, you can recognize Uncle Fred if you see him around town by his groundhog teeth necklace.

Here is the recipe. I had to promise to let Uncle Fred hunt squirrel on my property to get this from him. I later found out he got this off Pinterest so jokes on me.

Yummy jerkyYummy jerky