Yeah, sorry we aren’t listening to four hearings worth of public comment. But we’ll be happy to bring you council member comments!

We don’t know how the council members sit for that long!

We won’t listen to comments for three bills and the budget. We just can’t. However, if you would like to click here, or read this nice summary in the Frederick News Post.  We already reported on the first half of the meeting, and now we will bring you what we know you’ve been sitting on the edge of your seats for: Council Member Comments.

It really shouldn’t be this dramatic, but alas…

Tony’s got nothing to say so we are off to Kirby, and oh dear Sappho. According to Kirby taxes have gone up 10%, and since he doesn’t know anyone whose income has gone up 10% the money doesn’t match up and everyone should move out of Frederick County. Because 10% of one number is always equal to 10% of another number, right?


Then there was a long winded diatribe, after he shuffled through his papers for awhile, about how he was lied to about payment to a lobbyist. He even referred to our pal Katherine Heerbrandt’s blog. And we encourage you to read the post he was referring to here. Instead of going through Kirby’s rant about how he was lied to and told things were none of his business, you  be the judge of what really happened. All told, we really don’t think Kirby has a very good understanding of the charter and the powers allotted to the different branches of county government. We know, durh.

Jerry informs us that every member of the council was sent an email to make an appointment with the County Executive to discuss budget priorities. Shall we take wagers on who didn’t make an appointment, or is that too easy?

Billy, oh dear Mother Earth, Billy.  He enlightens us to the fact that budget time is really interesting because taxes never go down. (Is that the only reason, pal?) He then asks some really deep rhetorical questions:

“Where does it stop?”

“Where does it end?”

“Where does it end?”

“In Frederick County it looks like it never ends.”

Frederick County is in grave danger so it seems.

Jessica also reiterates the fact that on January 24th all council members received an email from the County Executive asking for a meeting regarding the budget. She also tells us about some very interesting things she learned on a tour of Ft. Detrick. We like science and knowledge and stuff so all of this was very fun to listen to.

M.C. is the gold star winner of the council member comments!

We may even commission her a trophy!

M.C. finds it concerning, as do we, that after two years of going through the budget process that is explicitly put forth in the charter, there are still questions about how it works! While she appreciates the effort in coming up with an alternative budget (we don’t!), according to the charter the council can’t do anything with it!! So, she encourages her fellow council members to put their efforts into making amendments to the CE’s budget AS IT IS SPELLED OUT IN THE CHARTER! She also reminds some of her fellow public servants that the charter states that when money is moved from one category to another it must come before the council. The County Executive, per the charter, is allowed to issue checks up to $20,000 without council approval. She then encourages Shrelauter her fellow council members, that if they don’t like these parts of the charter, then they should put some amendments forth next Spring. Until then, thems the rules! Stop wasting everyone’s precious time!

Next week there are a series of hearings and workshops on the budget. Stay tuned!

Who wants to be our County Executive? Kathy Afzali edition!

Mr. Hopkins is doing it better than you!

We’ve already alerted you to the fact that #kirbydelauter has a fancy new website up and running to collect all your money for his County Executive bid. Word is that former contender for that office, Blaine Young, is jumping aboard as his campaign manager. And BAWHAAHA! Please let that be true! Today we have some insight into our other rumored Republican contender for that office, Delegate Kathy Afzali.

In one of our fave FNP sections, Political Notes, we are made aware of how Delegate Afzali is conducting herself while representing our fine area in Annapolis. Turns out, not so good! You see, Delegate Afzali refuses to participate in the General Assembly’s women caucus. And wait until you see the REASONS:

“Afzali said she chooses not to take part in the caucus for several reasons. One, she said, is that so-called women’s issues generally apply to the population at large. She also feels that most of the discussion in caucus meetings would likely focus on liberal topics.”

Best go back into hibernation Mr. Fluffs!

Do we seriously have a delegate who believes that women’s issues do not exist? Is sexism over in Ms. Afzali’s imaginary utopia?  If that part isn’t astounding enough, let’s pay attention to the second part of her reasoning. It appears the Delegate cannot bear to be in the same room with those who do not subscribe to her point of view. We can imagine it can be quite taxing to share the same air with those who, through the thorough study of history, realize that women’s issues are not at all the same as those that men face.  And let us also call attention to her use of the word likely, as it appears she doesn’t even know what is going on in these meetings that she has taken such strides to avoid!

What makes this even sweeter for us to write about is that many Republican women statewide do NOT share Afzali’s point of view. In fact the article reported to us:

“Rey, a Republican who frequently takes part in floor debates in the House, said she enjoys the caucus meetings as a time to speak candidly with other lawmakers.”

“I think it’s a good place to really discuss the issues and it’s an opportunity to understand different points of view,” Rey said.”

WOW!! Can we trade Kathy for this gal?! If you want a chance at being our County Executive you better shape up lady! We ladies know that while we have made great strides in this country, there is still work to be done. And, if you do happen to be elected county executive, you sure as hell better get used to hearing opposing viewpoints. Because right now, you are doing it all WRONG!

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Your oscillating Yokel round-up!

Happy Friday y’all!!! Lots of good stuff to point out to you today, so let’s get started!

Adam Umak, proprietor of Frederick County Fact Check, had an excellent LTE in the paper this morning. Make sure you take a look at it. We cannot let Senator Hough and Delegate Afzali get away with this thinly veiled attack on our County  Executive!

Speaking of our CE,  in today’s Political Notes we were made aware of a Town Hall meeting next week. So, if you’ve got anything to say, get your behind over to Winchester Hall at 7 p.m. this upcoming Thursday.

Now for your end of the week comic relief. Kirby weighs in on the dueling ethics bills presented to the Maryland General Assembly this week:


You can’t wordsmith Kirby! 

Let this quote sink in folks:

“Never notified any land owners and then claims she knew nothing of the plan after the excrement hit the oscillating wind chime.”

That is our new favorite Kirby quote! Man oh man, you can’t make this stuff up! Have a great weekend!

The mystery is solved!!!!


Council member comments are now up and running as a part of the February 7th meeting. We’ve been speculating wildly as to what the hell Billy did to cause the county AV department to have to go into full editing mode. The mystery has been solved:

Billy claims that we have a rogue inspector roaming through the county randomly inspecting businesses! And this very naughty inspector is costing these businesses, which have been cited for violations, tens of thousands of dollars!!! Billy says that this individual, that he NAMES out LOUD, is “out of control!” He needs to be stopped! Billy is called out by both Bud and the county attorney for disparaging a county employee by name in a public forum, to which Billy screams, “Strike that from the record.” We know someone we would like to strike from our county government.

Billy is also very agitated that while he was out globe trotting, the council would not allow him to conference call in concerning the MTC. To him it is “sad that we have a government that operates this way.” One cannot help but wonder if this call was to take place while he was soaking up the rays with Blaine in Costa Rica. Nevertheless, Billy really hopes that there are some serious repercussions!

Kirby is also worth mentioning if for nothing else, his wild conspiracy theories.

Everything is terrible!

First off, now Kirby’s not accusing anyone mind you, BUT if county employees are aware of the bargain basement price some of the county machines are being auctioned off at..well ya know they could grab them up and then sell them off for a pretty penny!! Let’s be clear though, he is NOT aware of  ANYONE doing such a thing. But hey, what if? It’s very interesting to him.

Next on the conspiracy ticker, Jan Gardner. Did you people know that for as little as $50 you could get yourself a seat on the Planning Commission?  Everything, and he means EVERYTHING is for sale around here! “Gotta pay to play”! Kirby then starts ticking off some donations that Jan received and guess what? We are looking Kirby’s up as well! If he wants to start the donation listing game we will be more than glad to participate! What set Kirby off on the donation trail? Well, Michael Hough’s last minute ethics bill. You know the one that was submitted on February 1st with a February 3rd turn around date? Not the ethics bill that was properly vetted by the public, just something Hough scratched down last minute. If you are asking how Kirby found out that Jan was so unethical, you need look no further than our frenemy Red Maryland. That’s right a blog just like our own!(Come on Kirby, where’s the love? Don’t we get a mention?) Too bad that we couldn’t see Billy’s face when Kirby brought them up because man oh man they don’t like the Shreve!

As usual, the other council members had positive things to report, along with the unenviable job of telling us why everything that came out of Shrelauter’s collective jaw is so very wrong indeed. And for that, we thank them!


Love is in the air…or are we just drunk? Your February 7th drinking game!


It’s been a few weeks since we’ve had a council meeting, but now we are back and raring to go! Hopefully Kirby will bring his tear-shaped flow chart for us to behold. This week we are doing a drinking game bingo. We noticed that our favorite FNP poet, Armillary, requested that we do so.  So in honor of all his clever limericks, grab your agenda, pick your poison and be responsible!


2016: Do not pass Go! Do not collect $200! Go Directly to Jail!


Your Lady Yokels are holding our collective breath that we can get through these final two days of 2016 without any more tragedy. If you need a distraction to get you through the next couple of days be sure to read our end of year posts. First up we have our Most Popular Posts of 2016. You can revisit your favorite Yokel posts about all that went on in this tumultuous year. Also, we have the coveted Yokel In/Out List. Check back with us on January 4 when we will restart our coverage of our favorite governmental body.

Our Year in Review – 2016 version

As we close out 2016, it is a time for list making. We are not talking about a list of resolutions for 2017 (although, we could suggest some resolutions for a few Council Members, another post, perhaps?). We are talking about the Ins and Outs for our own Fred Co.

Year of the Cock, er, Rooster
Year of the Cock, er, Rooster