We’ve finally figured it out readers! We are living in an alternative reality than Shrelauter and, on occasion, Tony. It’s the only way this all makes any sense.

First let’s thank Baby Fitzwater for allowing his/her mommy to be in attendance during this very important meeting. Without her there…shiver…we don’t even want to think what would have happened.

Tony starts off the meeting trying to get the 6th item pulled off the agenda and wants to have clarification over what is a budget transfer and what is a supplemental appropriation.

On a side note-Kirby is saying yes instead of aye now. He used to say aye, but now he’s adopted Billy’s idiotic manner of using yes. Isn’t he such a brave rebel?

After Billy predictably votes against approving past meeting minutes, we are off on a discussion on bond offerings. There will be two bond series, A and B. A will pay for government projects such as schools, roads and other improvements. B is a refinance on  the note that was taken out three years ago to pay for Montevue/Citizens nursing home. And hey, we think we’ve found Billy’s Pavlovian response. Because holy hell, he won’t let it go. He has to be told by two separate people that this is to simply refinance a note that needs to be paid off, but he wants to know everything about the nursing homes right this very second. Tony gets confused about debt financing debt, which is not what this is. And it’s never easy for our county employees is it?

Now, brace yourself because it’s time to vote on the budget and capital improvement projects. Tony is right out of the gate with his: I’m very sorry but I cannot vote on this budget. Next it’s time for Kirby.

Well Yokels, we knew we wouldn’t get out of this one unscathed. It is ridiculous  to Kirby that the council only cut out $210,000 from this budget. It should have been more! And did you know the county council members are just cookie cutters to the County Executive’s budget (drink!)? Of course, and let’s not forget that Kirby believes they are giving the impression that they are handling this with the savoir-faire of drunken sailors, as well.

You didn’t think he was going to let this time go without pointing out that Jessica and Jerry vote on their salaries did you?

Jerry is the star of this evening.

Jerry sees this as a teachable moment. Too bad his students are Billy and Kirby. He reminds them if they actually met with department heads and sat down with the County Executive then maybe, just maybe, they would have seen more of what they wanted in the budget. After all, the time for negotiation is before the budget is written. Jerry pointed out that Kirby wanted to pull $1 million from the education budget.* To which Kirby sarcastically replies, “The children will suffer.”  He then points out that the former BOCC actually raised taxes which elicits a bait and switch comment from Kirby. Jerry then has to point out that Kirby does not know what bait and switch means (kinda like Billy doesn’t understand what a wedding crasher is). There are some more words exchanged which made your Yokel ladies wonder if there will be a fist fight later on.

Jessica adds that she will not cut the budget just for the sake of cutting. The community and department heads said they wanted to see these things in the budget, and that is what is happening. You hear that Shrelauter?! Pay better attention next year! You don’t get to pretend you did something just because you attempt to cut a million things out of the budget after the fact! Bud ends this portion of the meeting with: “We’ve had a good discussion, well we’ve had a discussion. Let’s vote”  Passes 4-3.

Tax rate stays at $1.06. All except two appointments pass with 7-0, Shreve being the only hold out on two. He probably blocked them on Twitter like he did to us as well. Animal control bequest goes off without a hitch and then we have our historical designation hearing on Glenellen Farm. We had a very nice presentation about the history of this property and Lady Thompson’s school that once existed there. This will be voted on at the next meeting. Public comment is one guy that Kirby gave a sheet to read from and then it’s time for council member comments.

Shade Trees and Evergreens is the popular theme this evening.

Kirby starts off the talk with how the county has ruined these poor people’s lives. But hey he’s also not saying that people should go out and do whatever they want. Then again if they’ve gotten away with it for 10 years, then it’s fine. Since they weren’t caught, it gives them immunity, right? But even though they were in the wrong the county shouldn’t bring the hammer down on  them. The county is a train wreck. A train wreck he says! Making businesses follow the rules is running them out of the county.

Bud says it doesn’t matter if nothing has happened in the past, that doesn’t excuse them. And if anything were to happen in the future shame on them all! Why can’t they see this? What is the matter with these three? Leave your diagnosis in the comments!

Frederick County politics strikes again.

* This is a correction. The county council did not take $1 million from the education budget as was previously noted. Jerry was pointing out to Kirby that his budget took $1 million dollars away from the schools. Your lady Yokels apologize for any confusion.