With friends like Blaine, who needs a enemy? #Kirbycampaign deluxe edition

We were first reluctant to advertise the Second Amendment Bait and Tackle Raffle Kirby cooked up to fish for funds, but things got Good Ol Entertaining. Follow along to see what happened next.

PEW PEW PEW Reminder: Delauter was cutting Meals on Wheels before cutting Meals on Wheels was en vogue; if conservatives believe we should handle our problems at the local level, but we handle them at no levels, is that effective government? Calling b.s. on that.

Since our copy is blurry, here is a bulleted list of content:

  • Thanks n stuff. Hugs to my homies.
  • Straight talk, straight answers. Ex: “I won’t sit here and be talked to like some punk.”
  • Family guy, business guy, veteran is worried about what we leave the next generation. (Historically with #: guns and $$ woohoo! Drinking water and blue crabs, meh.)
  • Gun Raffle!!!! That got Hough barrels o’ attention, amirite?
  • BBQ
  • Give him a holler at email or phone or money at website
  • Property rights (Presume he will be looking to donate to provide legal aid to ranchers on the U.S.- Mexico border. Yeehaw!)

This became irresistible, even though free publicity for Kirby’s Bake Sale makes us feel all icky inside, because two “all ickies inside” make a positive. It’s just how integers work. And our favorite skeevy former politician decided to endorse Kirby on Facebook in the Klassiest of ways. I can’t even. You can’t even. We can’t even.

Can y’all believe he didn’t add anything about his various prostitution scandals to this endorsement? Why not trot out all your greatest hits? Sincere question, Blaine: Have you ever been trending higher than Kanye? Maybe you don’t even have the je ne sais quoi to shine Kirb-o’s shoes. It is really strange how these people confuse total bonehead behavior with accomplishments! It’s almost charmingly idiotic!

Unsure about changed behavior. That post gives every impression that it was written by a drunk person, but maybe he is just incredibly stupid? Since the ladies are supposedly the reason Blaine lost, please be sure to grab these Good for Nothin’ Good Ol Boyz by the ballot. Local elections matter, yo.

Blaine’s a liar, pants on fire, nose is longer than a telephone wire

Yeah. What else is new? Blaine was on WFMD yesterday, which most of you know. You’d think under the circumstances, he’d lay a little low. He’s working on spinning his guilt in this criminal matter into some sort of public service mission to help others who have been victimized in the way that he has. Other slaves to their own lack of self-control. We’re not going to delve too deep into it. Just wanted to offer a little précis.

Amirite?
Right?

It was a softball interview that just gave Blaine a forum to rebrand himself, yet again. (Apparently he selected middle aged skaterboi on the Transmogrifyer dial, from the looks of him this time off the hooker-go-round.) In summary:

Feel bad for him. He came from a broken home. A guy down the street made unseemly advances toward him. This caused him to become a school yard bully so that he could get a change of venue, and abracadabra hocus pocus peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, he finds himself accidentally hunting for $60 motel massages. People are so mean! TL;DR. “It’s not my fault! I’m just here to help.”

He’s made a complete transition from john to attention whore.

Blaine’s gonna invade the airwaves!

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We have it on good authority that Blaine will be on WFMD tomorrow from 11-12 p.m. Wasn’t his sobbing, potentially perjury ridden performance on the Bob Miller show this week enough?What could he possibly say for one hour that any of us would want to hear? It’s really starting to sound as though those rumors about him running for the District 5 council seat are true. Why else would he be torturing us with so many public appearances?  If you have something you would really like to say to Mr. Young, please call the studio at 301-694-WFMD (9363).

We really, really don’t want to listen. But for you, our dear readers, we’ll try our best.