Look at the Brain on…oops, sorry…no brain…just look at Dan.

Dan Bongino apparently has a problem with Mediaite. Imagine being a 45 year old adult whose bio reads “He is a member of the Republican Party and ran unsuccessfully for Congress in 2012, 2014, and 2016…” and that’s pretty much it. You turn up at CPAC wearing a David Rose outfit (know your audience, man), perpetually looking like you’ve smeared your face in margarine, and calling *someone else* a douchebag. He is disgusting. His language is disgusting. His ideas are disgusting. His greasy face is disgusting. (Everyone at CPAC is disgusting, so at least he is in his element. “Boo Mitt Romney,” etc.)

It gets worse!

Imagine that this nasty, vulgar specimen had a fan club…it’s really just this one idiot. Our very own village idiot. We bet you know who it is…

Billy is lucky Mediaite hasn’t got to know him like they did BingoBongo. Frederick County really has something special in the water. Maybe it’s lead.

Give me a break.

But not you guys.

We saw a Facebook post today from the Southern Frederick County Rotary that made us wonder if these folks even know anything about Billy Shreve. Seriously. They may want to come up with a new four way test.


We noticed previously that Billy has taken credit for solving the opiod crisis and claiming he created the best education program in the state.

Other priorities in the General Assembly would be continued support for programs to stem heroin and opioid abuse. He pointed to the Classmates4Life video contest that he started, which called on Frederick County Public Schools students to explore the negative effects of drug abuse. The video contest received state and national recognition.

“I’ve created the best education program in the history of the state, so I want to continue to work on that,” Shreve said. “… I want to go to Annapolis and do everything I can to stop our kids from dying because of overdoses.

There surely is no harm in a video contest, but it has done nothing to reduce opiod overdoses in Frederick County. But don’t take our word for it. Check out the data. Overdoses are up and climbing in our county.

It is always nice to cherry pick a few small actions and give someone a pat on the back. We are here to remind you Billy has many, many, many low lights. Read all this if you need a refresher.


Billy Shreve shares “ideas” about women

Oh, yo. Look at this mental dust mite.

Monumental whatthef*#@ery. Also, if you can’t see it because the images are being cranky it is a Twitter tweety that has a bunch of statistics about men being mentally ill and prone to violence, and concludes that women have it better for sharing the planet with the violent and troubled other half of the population. Ahem. Also, let’s femsplain it to you: you know that women have been asking to be included equally in all aspects of the military and are not trying to place the responsibility of public safety on y’all men? The holdup has been a cocktail of “you’re not wanted here screwing up our camaraderie” and “we can’t stop you from getting raped, for some reason.” Ugh. Gah.

As you may or may not be able to tell from the image above, there is some rando on the internet who apparently does not have a social science background at all (and in all likelihood is some Russian poseur stimulating Billy’s antifeminist leanings). Billy Shreve is propagating his thoughts about how high statistics about suicide and homicide and warfare impacting men means that feminism is ridiculous. First of all, the way it is explained in sociology 101–where youngsters first learn about Émile Durkheim’s first ever study of the concept, self-evidently titled Suicidewomen are less prone to suicide because they have all the responsibilities of keeping a brood of offspring alive and cared for resting on their shoulders, because they are likely married to Papa Berenstain Bear, who is insultingly idiotic and has no idea how to feed or clothe his cubs or stay up all night nursing them back to health or figure out where their doctor or orthodontist’s office is or what their teacher’s name is, or like know offhand the location of a grocery store to pick up bread on the way home after six months of living in this city. So maybe the big dumdum part has some realism on occasion. #notallmen, yes, we know…we know. We do like our husbands.

Michelle Wolf has a super fantastic special on HBO right now called Nice Lady where she covers the important subject, “actually you can’t have it all,” and that’s really well worth watching. ***SPOILER ALERT: she talks about how it is impossible to be a good mom, and so she isn’t going to try, but also how she wishes she could be a good dad because the bar is so much lower and you get to avoid the issues presented with the absolutely unrealistic expectations placed on women in a judgmental country with no public policy to support working women and their families. This is because as a woman you have to have the kid, feed the kid, better be by breast but for goodness sake not in public; also go back to work (like yesterday), you can pump in the bathroom, and don’t take time off to take care of the kid that is constantly in need of both well visits and sick visits especially for a couple of years, and why are you distracted from your performance at work this week, and hurry up go have sex with your husband he’s going to find it elsewhere if you don’t, “And honey, why don’t you smile??????” (We don’t smile because people like Billy Shreve exist; also sometimes we do smile because people like Billy Shreve exist, but he does seem to become increasingly infuriating according to duration of exposure.)

Did Mark Twain really say this? Who the heck knows. We would Google it, but we don’t care. We didn’t even Google to see if the statistics in the original tweet were correct; odds are high that they aren’t.

Dare we suggest it might actually be better for men, too, if women weren’t so stressed out? And no doubt for their children as well.

Furthermore, we think it is super rich that this is coming from Billy “victim of sexual harassment” Shreve. You know, sometimes sexual harassment isn’t a snide remark, but a thing that happens to everyone from auto workers to actresses where they have to actually have sex with the boss if they want to keep their job. For Pete’s Sake! Read a flipping newspaper once in awhile. You might even learn from reading that 55% of women victims of homicide are killed by a domestic partner, where this is only true of about 5-7% of men. Isn’t that fascinating? Isn’t this mysterious information? Men are violent, and (according to Billy and co.) women are lucky to be murdered by men rather than the ones doing the murdering. What weird logic.

You know what else, Billy Shreve once said people are in favor of human trafficking, most likely because his bestest good buddy is a big ol fan of hookers. Don’t ever forget that one.

Man, this turned into a long rant. Yeah, we do have a bug up our asses, actually. Thank you for reading installment eleventybajillion in, “Do not reelect Billy Shreve to anything.”

Legislative priorities: moonshine & mobile home edition

It’s that time of year when Frederick County decides what they want the State of Maryland to accomplish. Always fun, because it allows our Council bookends to get creative with their fantasy lives.



Our current favorite is Billy Shreve’s (failed) proposal that mobile homes be sold as real property and not as vehicles. Here is the best way to explain why it ain’t never gonna happen: what mortgage lender would find it in their interest to make a loan where the collateral can be up and VROOM VROOM coal-rolled right off into the sunset? He had another one about exemptions from the Forest Resource Ordinance that fell flat due to insufficient information provided. Why can’t they have a staff to understand things for him, freeing him from the obligations of his job?

Jerry Donald FTW with a measure to deregulate the liquor industry (if you click on the FNP link up above they say it’s come about because of something impacting a Brunswick brewery). YEEHAW! The current code does not allow smaller banquet facilities–those with less than a quarter of a million dollars invested in non real estate type stuff–to have a liquor license. Donald points out that this seems to be a measure to eliminate competition. Look, we’re all Republicans on this one. More competition! Oh wait, when was the last time a Republican busted up a monopoly? Never mind then. Still not Republicans.

Modest hat tip to hoodie clad and newly beardless Tony Chmelik (we get the feeling he was under the weather with that awful thing going around, and boy do we sympathize: get well soon, Mr. Chmelik!) for moving his school related priority through the Board of Ed. ICYMI, he wants homeschoolers to be eligible for county school sports teams. Kudos to him for being the lone current Republican of the Council who seems to understand how processes and procedures best work.

Y’all aren’t going to believe this one. The King of the Deplorables and his buddy (these are Billy Shreve and Kirby Delauter, if you’re new here–we’ve written a bit about this particular issue) voted against a position statement favoring providing support to youth victims of human trafficking. Billy interjected a complaint about not knowing what it was until they saw it written out, which becomes ultra weird immediately afterward when…wait, no. It’s already ultra weird. Gross.

Kirby. He had an idea about investigating funding for school resources, so that perhaps funds from the state allocated to one project might be moved to another if they are not used for the one they were intended for. He tried to inexplicably call this a position statement. This already had us furrowing our brows, so when fellow semantics enthusiast Jessica Fitzwater pinpointed the issue we were grateful. More than position statement, this seemed a (likely reasonable) call to investigate. It needs to become a fully fledged idea, and that’s fine–even for Billy–to leave in the hands of Roger Wilson and the County Executive’s office, even though we certainly had the impression that we don’t currently know precisely what it says. Perhaps we should simply be glad for a rare sign of good faith. Passed 7-0, too! Well done! Was this a moment of bipartisan harmony? Perhaps we were hallucinating.

There was what felt like a long hearing about the Forest Resource Ordinance. It had us mostly sawing logs like it was a zoning discussion. We did perk up when Kirby mused about what this was actually protecting and was told that there is a definition of forest and the county and the state use the same one. Guffaw!

That’s yer County Council, folks!