20/20 hindsight? We have 20/20 foresight! It’s your weekly drinking game time.

Pulease hold onto your liver. This meeting could put you 5 steps closer to cirrhosis. Grab your agenda while we look into our crystal balls to predict how this meeting is going to go down.

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Just kidding. This is our Cristal. Get it???

When Billy abstains from the agenda, shake your fist at your screen and fix yourself a drunk uncle.

Since Kirby was such a jerk last week, and Tony was the week before, we predict the public will show up to comment at the beginning of the meeting. The public wants to be heard. When this happens swing back a shot of brandy to steel your nerves.

Next up are several budget adjustments for emergency services and les pauvres enfants. Shrelauter usually talks up how important fire and rescue are until it is actually time to spend money. When one of them starts squawking, pour yourself a screaming eagle.

Next up, business items.

There are board confirmations, and then two items related to transportation. Then Tony Chmelik will discuss the state legislative issues, so have a Flying Dog during the business items, because there are some dueling beer bills in Annapolis, and our small craft breweries are at risk. (If you would like to be a beer advocate, details about the beer bills are here). Be good to our local businesses.

First reading calendar. The agenda lists dueling senior tax credit bills. Kirby already tried and failed to propose a fully thought out tax credit bill for public servants, so we are not holding our breath that this first reading of his will be any more successful. Fortunately, Jerry’s bill is up first. Cristal is telling me that we should all have a bottle on standby. When Jerry’s bill is well received take a swig. If you just want Kirby to stop talking, take another swig.

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We are looking at you Kirby.

M.C. Keegan-Ayer is proposing legislation that would make more stringent guidelines to the effect that if your neighborhood pool isn’t in your neighborhood, then it’s not your neighborhood pool. If that makes sense to you, have another swig. If you think your neighborhood pool should be outside your neighborhood, you know nothing. You get nothing.

Now we are all the way up to the dramatic third readings, and y’all. We’re nervous. Not gonna lie.

A decision will be made on Jan’s Bill regarding DRRAs (Developer Rights and Responsibilities, if you’re nasty). Finish the bottle. Finish it before they start talking or voting, and then steel yourself for…

Permitted Uses in MXD. Council decision. Pick your poison. And there’s an addition of a proposed amendment by Council President Bud Otis.

Then there is a public hearing on a Water and Sewerage Plan Amendment, which sounds like the perfect time to pass out after what may happen above. Especially since they go on a break and reconvene at 7:00 to cover the Amended Forest Resource Ordinance and Public Comments.

Council Member Comments would be a good time to loudly crunch some ice chips.

Fin.

 

 

 

 

 

It’s the last meeting of the year! Let’s celebrate with a whole lot of beer!

 

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Wish we knew Patches! Don’t destroy your liver over him though!

FA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA! Merry Happy Winter Solstice to thee! It’s the last meeting of 2017, and what a year it has been following this county council. Stay tuned, in the next week or so we’ll be publishing our top 10 stories of the year! For now, grab your agenda, turn on FCGTV, and don’t forget to take care! Shrelauter would love it if something happened to your liver and you couldn’t vote for their opponent next year.

We sure hope Kirby had some time to go through the agenda and prepare this weekend. Seeing as he was busy spreading his “freedom seeds” around:

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Big deep sigh! Any hoo! We are starting off this meeting with lots of recognition and accolades. It gives us a nice warm feeling to see all the good that is done by people in our community.

Next is public comment, should there be any, budget adjustments, and approval of prior meeting’s minutes. We don’t know why this shouldn’t go smoothly, however, since we have a few people up there who like to grandstand and, we suspect, really don’t know what’s going on, there’s bound to be a hiccup here and there. If you should need something to calm your nerves, pop open a nice tall bottle of Belligerent Ass.

We always love it when Lori Depies comes to present. She so professionally handles the questions from the nincompoops, while also correcting their erroneous assumptions. In her honor, we’ll stray away from the beer theme for a moment, to crack open a bottle of our best champagne! Thanks for all you do and have to put up with Ms. Depies!

Next on the list is approval of an annexation in Myersville.  The town of Myersville already voted yes, and it appears the owners of the land want this, so if anyone causes a ruckus, go ahead and slam back a Raging Bitch.

There’s a first reading on a bill on Permitted Uses in a MXD. First readings only take a moment. Then it’s off to a third reading, which means a final council vote, on the Veteran’s Advisory Council. In honor of our men and women in uniform, toast them with an Eagle Lager.

Oh, zzzzzz, a public hearing on water and sewer amendments. We know this stuff is super important, but man oh man, it’s hard to stay awake. Maybe we need to go out and find some caffeinated beer.

We end with one more chance for public comment, and then the last council member comments of 2017. If anyone decides to go on and on, or becomes oh so very rude, break out that college beer bong and fill it with some Grumpy Bear Honey Wheat.

Have a wonderful holiday season our faithful Yokels! We’ll all need to stick together next year when the county election season is in full force! There’s no way this isn’t going to be dramatic!