Amateur Diagnosis Day: Is there a reason Kirby can’t learn?

Hold on to your hats, folks. If you were wondering if we would drag out the dead horse trope again, we have decided to work a new angle at the local desk. An emerging theory behind the scenes.

There are individuals who seem to have no ability to learn from their mistakes. They will continue to repeat the same behaviour over and over again and never learn from the disastrous outcome. “Do You Never Learn From Your Mistakes? – You May Have a Behavioural or Brain Disorder.” April 1, 2o13

Just look at this list of symptoms!

“I’m not gonna sit here and be talked to like some kind of punk.” (mood swings, unable to accept criticism)

Surely this would explain numerous temperamental outbursts, inability to stop repeatedly making nationally embarrassing missteps in use of social media, and the fact that we (yet again) need to publish this graphic from, oh, like the first week we started blogging.

 Imagine if you had to be Farell Keough's teacher. Does that illustrate how hard this job is?
Haha, the original caption was this, in response to some LTE nonsense: Imagine if you had to be Farell Keough’s teacher. Does that illustrate how hard this job is? (And,  it is still perfectly relevant, since  guess who showed up last night to keep yapping about this himself–amateur diagnoses all around, then. Cheers!)

Now, we did enjoy Kirby’s explanation of how much it chaps his hide to endure the implications that that county employees would be willing to grant people special favors. Obviously he’s just watching out for the little guys, here, like any of us would. The same blowhard who stormed out in a huff because some county employee requested that he stop interrupting an explanation of the need for equipment for his department! Impressive that he has adopted this new chivalrous attitude! Wheeeeeee. To think only of others at a time like this, when he is being persecuted by this targeted law–Kirby’s Law, some would say. It is really curious, now isn’t it, that so many other Maryland counties have some version of Kirby’s Law already enacted. Why does all of Maryland, maybe all of America, hate Kirby so much? It’s probably Rachel Maddow’s fault…


Kirby admits that he has no point, defending himself against the implication that he depends upon the government for his business success, belying the the Oliver Twist posturing he likes to adopt about how this is affecting his livelihood. Which is it, dude? Pick one position, please. Don’t get greedy.

This is what happens when council member comments are done extemporaneously. You make no sense.
This is what happens when council member comments are done extemporaneously. You make no sense.

As awesome as it is that Kirby is such an upstanding citizen servant, to the point that we don’t even need to worry about any appearances of impropriety, let’s think a moment. What if the next guy elected is not as squeaky clean as Mr. Hashtag? Hmmmm. Riddle us that, oh man of many contradictions.



#kirbydelauter throws online tantrum (again), refuses to donate to kids

JeezLouise. This guy. He’s clearly mad that Frederick County (belatedly joining the rest of Maryland) is also not going to be hiring its council persons to do their construction work. Airing his grievances like this happens to really get our knickers into knots. If his business was so dependent upon Frederick County in order to profit, the least he could have done was sincerely look for other donors to help Catoctin High School Athletics. Assuming a county school would be unlikely to get into a political brouhaha with a county council member, we will ask on his disgusting, self-serving behalf.

Is anyone more despicable than this? Just gross.
Is anyone more despicable than this? Just gross.

So hey, if you should find yourself in a position to be generous,  consider sending some coin to the extra-curricular programs at our stretched-thin schools. Since this guy’s mad at some other council members, he’s taking it out on the students. Publicly. Because #kirbydelauter cannot learn from past mistakes.

Oh, and if this is staged and did not actually affect the status of a donation–and it well could be–pretending to be stingy with kids because you’re mad at adults is just as bad, in that you still look like the same jerk. But dumber, because you want to show everyone you’re awful, and that is facepalm stupid.

If you have specific contact information to  process donations or promote fundraisers for student activities in Frederick County, please feel free to share in our social media contacts.