Hail Mary, let’s talk about the primary!

It’s been so busy here at Yokel headquarters!

All the votes from the primary election are in and now the work begins! We knocked out the entire 2nd rate hate slate, but the spirit of John Wilkes Booth still runs through 3/4ths of the OG hate slate.

He was useless just like Cindy, Nancy, and Olivia would be on the school board.
We do have to say we liked that David Brooks knocked Mark Joannides down a notch, because someone needed to! We all need to regroup now and make sure that 4 sane candidates make it up. For we cannot afford to have one of these backwards talkers on our precious school board.

Something is askew in District 5! Instead of the local Republikkins letting team normal, in the form of Michael Blue, continue on they put forth someone who thinks that Kirby is a hero.

The lack of judgement is astounding. Guess Michael Blue didn’t stroke Kirby’s ego well enough so he put this kid’s signs all over his trucks. And look at precious little Billy. I wonder how Pence feels about his name on that shirt these days.

Karl Bickel won the Democratic nod for what we call the High Sheriff around these parts. We’ve written quite a bit about the current High Sheriff, but feel free to revisit here.

It’s past time for this one to go!

Jessica will go up against the Chief of Staff for carpet bagger Alex Mooney who is currently under investigation for various ethics violations. We recently told the tale of how he didn’t want to raise the teenage marriage rate to 17 because he still believes in child brides. So you know we all need to rally behind Jessica on this one.

Never forget that he posted this the day after the Marjorie Stoneman Douglass shooting.

Our two Frederick County GOP gubernatorial candidates faced off with the dumbest one winning. From this concession post, we don’t think that Kelly is going to be backing him in the general!

He who must not be named! Keep an eye on our social media for every Monday we will post a new Dan Cox article from our extensive archives.

There’s of course many more races, and we promise to get to them. We must keep up our momentum and make sure that we keep our county government both sane and functional!

How did your Lady Yokels spend Inauguration Day? Watching the local Republicans eat their own..again!

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Friendship is fragile in these here parts!

Your friendly Lady Yokels were discussing how our own Frederick Republican party is a harbinger of the national party. If we are right, then there is hope to be had. We already elected and disposed of our own Donald Trump. We may have to wait four years for the real one to go, but surely this will occur! If this trend of the national reflecting the local continues, then the national GOP party is about to eat one another alive.

Do you remember a few weeks back when our nice local senator wanted to raise some money by raffling off an AR 15 rifle? You know the same kind of rifle used by that monster in Sandy Hook to end a bunch of little kid’s lives. You may ask why would an elected representative do such a thing? Well, because he’s a great defender of the 2nd Amendment that was bestowed upon us straight from the creator above! It’s true, according to Sen. Michael Hough, God himself is responsible for the 2nd amendment.

You may expect that his fellow Republicans would be all hunky dory with this. Especially since many of them are also great defenders of the Lord’s amendment. However, you would be very wrong indeed! In today’s Frederick Extra report we learn that Sheriff Jenkins believes that the good senator did not obtain the proper permits. And oh traitorous gods of yore, what did Hough do to piss Jenkins off ?! Unfortunately, Jenkins hands are tied until someone actually files a complaint. Wink, wink..any takers?

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Who will answer Jenkins’ call?

In the Extra Buzzz, we also learn that someone else is “concerned” about this raffle. “Someone” who has previously been very close to the senator, but now has some concerns! Where is the loyalty with these people?

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Thank you local Republicans, for giving us a chuckle on this day that we thought we couldn’t crack a smile.