Yesterday we wrote about Governor Hogan’s Executive Order that now dictates the school year for all Maryland counties. What you may not have seen, and may be very mad at us for bringing into your lives, is Comptroller Peter Franchot and Ocean City Mayor Richard Meehan’s nice little piece of propaganda that takes the form of a You Tube Video. In the spirit of Tosh.O we are going to give you a breakdown of everything that is wrong with this three minutes of our lives that is now gone forever.

First we begin with our two stars hanging out on the boardwalk and guess what? They can’t find ANYBODY that disagrees with their notion that schools should start after Labor Day. It’s just common sense y’all!  Everyone loves it! Teachers, because they can work their second jobs longer! (That’s a thing that was said.) And Parents! And Kids!

Here they are presumably on the hunt for those “couple of people who are holding this idea up”, but they are no where to be found. Imagine that! People who are at the beach, probably having a pretty good time, cannot come up with any reasons as to why schools shouldn’t go back until after Labor Day. Hopefully this isn’t the same data model they used to ensure us that this will bring millions upon millions of dollars into the State coffers.

Now this part is really LOL! Our two stars are strolling the boardwalk yelling, “Are you from Maryland?” We guess they actually wanted to talk to people that would be affected by their proposal. Who do they settle on? German tourists. That’s right, Europeans who live thousands of miles away. The nice lady in the middle tells them that school in Germany starts in September to which our fine gentlemen are appropriately horrified. The Mayor even yells, “They start after Labor Day and they don’t even have Labor Day!” Oh the misplaced outrage!

Well, we found this entry on Wikipedia about the German school year:

The school year starts after the summer break (different from state to state, usually end/mid of August) and is divided into two terms. There are typically 12 weeks of holidays in addition to public holidays. Exact dates differ between states, but there are generally six weeks of summer and two weeks of Christmas holiday. The other holiday periods occur in spring (during the period around Easter Sunday) and autumn (during the former harvest, where farmers used to need their children for field work). Schools can also schedule two or three special days off per term.

Took two seconds to find that fellas! And their summer is only 6 weeks long! Even with our current schedule we manage 8-9 weeks off. Now let’s wrap this thing up!  Our dynamic duo has a snazzy new slogan for us! Ready! Set! Go!

AFTER LABOR DAY!

Really? That’s the best you could come up with? And what’s that fur in the bottom of the photo?  This video truly goes down as one of the egregious pieces of propaganda we have seen this side of the 21st century.