A trillion shades of NO!

We swear this isn’t a Halloween trick:

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Well, he possesses a modicum of self-awareness!

Does he really think that four years will be enough time for everyone to forget all he’s done? Let us spell out our reaction in a series of memes:

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Sorry you had to be exposed to that Myrtle!

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More shades Grumpy Cat! More shades!

Not to worry folks! With your assistance,we will make sure that everyone remembers his disastrous four years at the helm of our county. And, if people need to be reminded of his arrest, the way he cussed out the teenage ref, or any of the many other ways he behaved that shows just how undeserving he is of any of our votes, well…we’ll be here to remind.

Legislative priorities: moonshine & mobile home edition

It’s that time of year when Frederick County decides what they want the State of Maryland to accomplish. Always fun, because it allows our Council bookends to get creative with their fantasy lives.

 

 

Our current favorite is Billy Shreve’s (failed) proposal that mobile homes be sold as real property and not as vehicles. Here is the best way to explain why it ain’t never gonna happen: what mortgage lender would find it in their interest to make a loan where the collateral can be up and VROOM VROOM coal-rolled right off into the sunset? He had another one about exemptions from the Forest Resource Ordinance that fell flat due to insufficient information provided. Why can’t they have a staff to understand things for him, freeing him from the obligations of his job?

Jerry Donald FTW with a measure to deregulate the liquor industry (if you click on the FNP link up above they say it’s come about because of something impacting a Brunswick brewery). YEEHAW! The current code does not allow smaller banquet facilities–those with less than a quarter of a million dollars invested in non real estate type stuff–to have a liquor license. Donald points out that this seems to be a measure to eliminate competition. Look, we’re all Republicans on this one. More competition! Oh wait, when was the last time a Republican busted up a monopoly? Never mind then. Still not Republicans.

Modest hat tip to hoodie clad and newly beardless Tony Chmelik (we get the feeling he was under the weather with that awful thing going around, and boy do we sympathize: get well soon, Mr. Chmelik!) for moving his school related priority through the Board of Ed. ICYMI, he wants homeschoolers to be eligible for county school sports teams. Kudos to him for being the lone current Republican of the Council who seems to understand how processes and procedures best work.

Y’all aren’t going to believe this one. The King of the Deplorables and his buddy (these are Billy Shreve and Kirby Delauter, if you’re new here–we’ve written a bit about this particular issue) voted against a position statement favoring providing support to youth victims of human trafficking. Billy interjected a complaint about not knowing what it was until they saw it written out, which becomes ultra weird immediately afterward when…wait, no. It’s already ultra weird. Gross.

Kirby. He had an idea about investigating funding for school resources, so that perhaps funds from the state allocated to one project might be moved to another if they are not used for the one they were intended for. He tried to inexplicably call this a position statement. This already had us furrowing our brows, so when fellow semantics enthusiast Jessica Fitzwater pinpointed the issue we were grateful. More than position statement, this seemed a (likely reasonable) call to investigate. It needs to become a fully fledged idea, and that’s fine–even for Billy–to leave in the hands of Roger Wilson and the County Executive’s office, even though we certainly had the impression that we don’t currently know precisely what it says. Perhaps we should simply be glad for a rare sign of good faith. Passed 7-0, too! Well done! Was this a moment of bipartisan harmony? Perhaps we were hallucinating.

There was what felt like a long hearing about the Forest Resource Ordinance. It had us mostly sawing logs like it was a zoning discussion. We did perk up when Kirby mused about what this was actually protecting and was told that there is a definition of forest and the county and the state use the same one. Guffaw!

That’s yer County Council, folks!

 

Ain’t’ too proud to beg! AGAIN!

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We know we just asked you to vote for us in the FNP’s Best of the Best contest (those results will be released this Friday), but we need your voting powers one more time! It’s that time of the year when Frederick Magazine takes their nominations for their Best of Frederick contest. Please click on over and enter Frederick Local Yokel as your favorite blog! We will be forever grateful.

It’s poll time. But not our poll…

One of our frenemies is looking for information and has put out a survey because Frederick is just too darn big for her to knock on everyone’s door. There are only 11 questions so it shouldn’t take you too long to fill it out. Here is a sample question. See if you can figure out what is wrong with it.

Misleading question
Property tax rates have NOT increased. Property values have increased.

Your yokels like math so that makes sense right?

Math burn

Well, go ahead and take her poll if you want. Make sure you write in the issues that are important to you.

The bills are in the mail Afzali and Delauter!

On two separate occasions these past few weeks, our frenemies Kathy Afzali and Kirby Delauter have benefited from your Lady Yokel’s proofreading skills. Let us lay the evidence before thee.

Let’s start with Kathy Afzali. You may remember the post we wrote about her very poorly done website we posted on September 15th. We pointed out these glaring mistakes:

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Isn’t the heart sweet?
Well, now look at her website!

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Therefore, she gets one of these:

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You may think that’s a little steep! And all we have to say is, “FREE MARKET, people!”
Kirby is also receiving a bill. Just a few days ago we pointed out his egregious use of the Washington Post’s Fact Checker page’s Pinocchio icon. Not only the icon ,but also the fact that he spelled Pinocchio wrong.

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We received some info about these claims. Here are the real facts:

The County received its first AAA bond rating from Fitch in March 2010   (Gardner BOCC)

The County received its second AAA bond rating from S & P in July 2014 (Young BOCC)
The triple AAA from Fitch was maintained in the interim period.

The County received its third AAA bond rating from Moody’s in June 2016 (Gardner CE)
The triple AAA ratings from Fitch and S & P maintained in interim period.

The first time the county had AAA bond ratings from all three agencies was in June 2016.

Now, we know he will keep getting the facts wrong, however, he did correct his misspelling. It’s still beyond us why he’s putting the puppet’s name in quotes.

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Therefore, Kirby also receives one of these:

 

 

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We’ll let you know if we hit payday!!